The lengthy and unwanted description of disgusting medical problems and alerts the elderly will occasionally inflict on their relatives. Lacking a polite way to beg off, one must sit through the nauseating stories of consistency, texture, and medicating that ensue.
Well, it turns out your grandfather doesn't need lunch today; Too bad I had to sit through the Bowel Report to find that out.
by Arrackon May 29, 2010
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A term that originated from the 2018 game Among Us, in which it would describe a player reporting a dead body that they themselves had killed; its use has since been expanded to describe any action by a person that unnecessarily draws attention to something negative about themselves. It is similar to a Freudian slip, but it does not require the person to make an accidental error; their words or actions are typically deliberate, and the person may already be perfectly aware of the negative connotations of their conduct.
Original Use
Player 1: I found this body in the communications room.
Player 2: I checked the vitals monitor a few seconds ago and no one was dead, this kill must have just happened.
Player 3: Is this a self-report?
Current Use
Person A: I like when people post about funny things they do to get out of doing work at their jobs, it really makes everyone seem a bit more human.
Person B: Fair, although the self-report can often get a person fired if they post using their actual name, so I wouldn't recommend joining them anytime soon, okay?
Player 1: I found this body in the communications room.
Player 2: I checked the vitals monitor a few seconds ago and no one was dead, this kill must have just happened.
Player 3: Is this a self-report?
Current Use
Person A: I like when people post about funny things they do to get out of doing work at their jobs, it really makes everyone seem a bit more human.
Person B: Fair, although the self-report can often get a person fired if they post using their actual name, so I wouldn't recommend joining them anytime soon, okay?
by MidniteLRG June 27, 2024
Get the self-report mug.A term from Among Us,a popular game made in 2018,which means for an Imposter to kill a Crewmate and report the body right after to pretend they found a body.However,this term has reached outside of Among Us,in the meaning of someone accusing a person of doing/being something,despite the fact that the person accusing the other person also doing/being whatever they are accusing the other person.
In Among Us:
Cyan:I found a body in Navigation
Red:Body was reported too fast after the round started.This is probably a self report.
In other uses:
Commenter 1:(saying something that would imply they're unemployed)
Commenter 2: Holy unemployed🥀
Commenter 3: @Commenter2 Bro self reported😭🚡
Cyan:I found a body in Navigation
Red:Body was reported too fast after the round started.This is probably a self report.
In other uses:
Commenter 1:(saying something that would imply they're unemployed)
Commenter 2: Holy unemployed🥀
Commenter 3: @Commenter2 Bro self reported😭🚡
by sadbartsimpsonreal October 17, 2025
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