I will sleep early today

Play games at 7 PM, Watch movies at 8 PM, Scroll on TikTok at 10 PM, Watch anime till 2 AM, Chat on Discord at 3AM

you know, i will sleep early today

by PseudoNullXero December 15, 2023

Empire Today

A popular flooring and carpeting company that has a catchy jingle that no one could resist singing along to when the commercial comes on

Chorus: (singing): “800-588-2300, Empire Today!”

by rosenovarocks July 23, 2021

Today I received a Bandi

To receive a excessively long monologue in the form of a message, on any kind of chat platform.

Yesterday i had fallen out with my friend, but TODAY I RECEIVED A BANDI. It was nearly 4 pages long and he apologised for everything.

by xMinister February 10, 2022

what did you guys have for lunch today?

something to say to divert a conversation in a group chat from a previous topic that =

no one cares about
people got uncomfortable with
one would use to avoid talking about
no one is interested in

usually, people say it like this =
"anyways, what did you guys have for lunch today?"

dude = "GUYS I FOUND A QUARTER ON THE GROUND JUST NOW. I'M RICH, BI8CH"

another dude = "anyways, what did you guys have for lunch today?"

by josh hutcherson x rick astley December 23, 2023

Todays going to be a good day

Something a person says to trick themselves into thinking the day isn't going to turn out horribly. It will. No one can stop it. Not even steve.
Or used for sarcasm when something bad happens to lighten the mood.

*yawns* 'Todays going to be a good day' -dog shits on the bed-

by Toddthe3rd August 2, 2022

Picnic Today

An old man with a limited grasp of the English Language approaches you and your friend just snacking on some chips.

"Picnic Today" He says "uh yeah I geuss" you say as your friend sits behind you positively bewildered.

by Absurdly huge January 24, 2022

not today dog

a synonym for "no" or "later"

A: hey wanna smoke some weed?
B: Not today dog

by TokenIranian March 21, 2016