god I wish that were me

Any situation that you view online or from a third person and aspire to be one of the active people or objects in that particular situation.

*looking at a terribly animated photo of a baby cradled by a deformed mother*
BigJB21: god I wish that were me

by lukewarmwolf December 21, 2018

I wish that was Justin Bieber

A comment often posted by Justin Bieber haters on YouTube videos that feature someone getting badly hurt. These comments often get a lot of thumbs-ups, and are usually posted by the more "angry" breed of haters.

Random Justin Bieber Hater: *watches video of someone getting run over by a speeding car, and then getting run over by another one* "Man, I wish that was Justin Bieber"

by JustinBieberHater82189339 January 03, 2012

wish pain on ya kids

What you say to someone who is being a complete dick.

Person: You cant sit there Im saving that seat for my buddy you scumbag!

Me: Ok, wish pain on ya kids.

by wish pain on ya kids August 02, 2005

I wish I were Heather

Conan Gray's adorable gay ass expressing how his crush chose 'Heather', this perfect little barbie doll that is amazing in every way, over him.

It's a metaphor on how he says he wish we were Heather so he could be finally loved by his crush for once.

Heather: "Hey Jackal, looking good today!"
Jackal *crush* : "Hey Heather! Wanna go to the movies to watch that new horror movie?"
Heather: "Sure!"

Conan, on the verge of killing himself: "I wish I were Heather"

by iwishiwereheather August 20, 2020

Wish in one hand, shit in the other.

"Wish in one hand, shit in the other. See which one gets filled first." When a person wants the impossible.

Joe: We need world peace. Can't we just all get along?
Tom: Well Joe, Wish in one hand, shit in the other.

by ebensteben April 27, 2008

I wish I could do that

Joke. When you see a buddy's dog licking his dick and you say,"I wish I could do that." Your buddy replies,"Go ahead,but,he's liable to bite you."

"I wish I could do that" is what you say when you see a dog licking his dick.

by wolfbait51 April 12, 2011

i wish you were a derivative

The funniest pick up line ever made. It works really well, as I've used it on several occasions. The most notable of which was when i got with this really hot chick named Steve.

I wish you were a derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.

by Nick Shatan April 04, 2007