Skip to main content

Chess

A “sport” which became largely popular in recent times because all of the popular kids in school started playing it.

An excuse for the wettest wet wipes out there to make friends.
Friend: Let’s go! I just destroyed this noob!

Me: Nice. What game was it?

Friend: Oh, it was chess.

Me: Never talk to me again, you wet wipe.
by Fr*nch Weirdo 69 May 15, 2023
mugGet the Chess mug.

sexy chess

chess but whoever loses has to do whatever sexual thing the other person wants.
Girl: I just beat u in sexy chess. Now be a good little boy and eat me out.
Boy: yes mommy 🥺
by singlelesbian521 December 24, 2022
mugGet the sexy chess mug.

Chess Boxing

A niche sport where you box someone and play chess
"Did you watch that chess boxing tournament?"
"Yeah man, it was crazy."
by A Schlatt Fan December 27, 2022
mugGet the Chess Boxing mug.

chess

One of the world's oldest games, chess is classified as a board game, but is more like a mental sport, and is actually a massive example of the Dunning-Kruger effect. No matter how good you are at the game, you still suck, even the greatest players know they suck, and if you think you are good, you most DEFINITELY suck. All chess tournaments are competitions of who sucks least, everybody sucks to some degree, unless your name is Magnus Carlsen, and even he sucks next to a computer. It is believed (though not proven) that a perfectly-played game of chess will always end in a draw, and when someone wins, it is always because the other person fucked up.

Most people, due to pop-cultural osmosis, know the basic rules of chess, but know nothing about how to actually play the game. This frequently results in people who have a modicum of skill thinking they are "good at chess" because they've only ever played "regular" people, then when they try playing against actual chess players, they're in for a rude awakening.

If you get into chess as an adult, you will discover that 8-year-olds regularly whup your ass forwards, backwards, and sideways at the game every single time, but at least you can go home knowing that you have had sex, and they have not (though, this is also questionable if you are a chess player).

Despite the growing popularity of chess since COVID, and recent attempts to reach out to women, any given night at a chess club is almost guaranteed to be a sausage party.
by q359 July 24, 2023
mugGet the chess mug.

Bathroom Chess

Chess in the bathroom... or sex... not sure which rly.
"hey, lets play bathroom chess ;)" "okay, lemme grab the board." "what board?"
by CCG_2521 July 25, 2023
mugGet the Bathroom Chess mug.

Dego Chess

To tell a beaner named Diego to play chess with you.
by Spiegg September 20, 2023
mugGet the Dego Chess mug.

chess

a game where 2 kingdoms fight each other while being figures
pawn being the seemingly useless but has tricks up its sleeves

knight being the coolest, winning by taking L's
bishop go diagonal
rook be going straight and sideways
queen being everything except for knight, its too cool to take L's
king being the fucking crybaby that needs protection and somehow s the most significant one on the board
checkmate, castling, you get the idea

do the funny botez gambit for cool
"chess"
"chess"
by Cloudy_yduolC April 22, 2022
mugGet the chess mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email