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wankers' rickets 

The name given to the weakening of the knees when approaching orgasm standing up, when indulging in a bout of self-gratification.
"I was givin' it sum in the shower, and got wankers' rickets so bad I ripped the shower curtain off the rail!"
wankers' rickets by Niall Brady January 8, 2003

Wankers Whiplash 

a sensation experienced when having a wank but you are disturbed by someone openning the door etc and you must turn around or pull your pants up very quickly.
I was having a wank yesterday when my mum was out but she came home early and I got wankers whiplash
Wankers Whiplash by Aff September 27, 2005

Wankers Doo

When you call in for a friend after he has a wank, he will be sitting with a sweaty head and a greasy greasy hair"doo". Therefore he has a wankers doo
Knock Knock
whos there?
fred
aww ok come in
Jez sir uve a wile wankers doo, were u wanking
Aye i waz surely, very sweaty now

wankers cramp 

Soreness in the hand - and in particular, the wrist - brought on by excessive or inhuman levels of masturbation. Known to cause chafing and in some cases, bleeding, to the area in question.
Tom Hanks' character in Saving Private Ryan was a sufferer of Wankers cramp.
wankers cramp by CommieKras May 19, 2010

wankers tash 

The bit of hair that goes from your balls (testicles) up to and around your belly button, like a snails trail of hair
"did you see daves belly, it looks like his wankers tash goes from his balls to his chin!"
wankers tash by Littlebilly May 7, 2007

Wankers' hatrick 

A status achieved by an individual who owns all three of; Range Rover Sport, Mont Blanc pen and Rolex watch. A brash display of classless materialism.
That guy has a wankers' hatrick
Wankers' hatrick by Tony Vegas August 24, 2017