Dilbert

A retarded mop that gives you a back ache when you use it. When you say it, you must say it as though you were menatlly retarded.

Hey Tori, I was using Dilbert and he made me want to shoot myself.

Whose Dilbert?

That retarded dollar store mop!

Dilbert by Ashley and Tori May 29, 2007

Dilbert

A god in Gang Beasts and life. Who some say is controlled by the elusive Skydoesminecraft (Adam).

"Dilbert is the champion."

LONG LIVE THE KING

Dilbert by CryptidKor4 August 17, 2021

Dilbert Special

The ancient art of cock-blocking yourself. This can be anything from what you say, to what you do around a female you are interested in. Basically, any self-sabotage that will take you from getting a girl, to getting nothing.

Generally done whilst out drinking in a bar/club, but occasionally it can extend to choices made whilst sober, like canceling a date to go out drinking with mates, or saying the wrong thing whilst out on a date.

While trying for a threesome: 'There's a way we can all win here' - Drunk Dilbert Special

While engaging in conversation whilst out drinking: 'I'm sorry, I wasn't listening, I was looking at your boobs' - Epically - Drunk Dilbert Special

While engaging in sober conversation on a date: 'Women can't play sports, I thought everyone knew that?' - Sober Dilbert special

Dilbert Special by The Avengerer October 4, 2010

Dilbert Gibbs

A reference to White House "Press" Secretary Robert Gibbs' indistinguishable resemblance to the pathetic loser cartoon character "Dilbert"...

Dilbert Gibbs was out bullshitting the press corp with more manufactured answers to preselected questions asked by members of the Progressieve Media's "Elite" Propaganda Wing...

Dilbert Gibbs by Jared L. Ohlinger July 1, 2009

Dilbert Moment

A situation in a technical workspace that would make a great Dilbert cartoon. Usually, you alone find the situation absurd and instigator is oblivious.

developer: "Here's my design for review".
boss: "I don't understand it. Does anybody else have an issues with it?"

One week later.

boss: "I think I've come up with a really good design."
developer: "Wait a minute. That's the design I sent you last week. This is frikn Dilbert Moment."

Dilbert Moment by gotChaos? September 26, 2010

Dilbert hole

1. The female urethra. Not the same thing as the vagina, although clueless dudes frequently confuse the two.

2. Scott Adams, creator of the office-themed comic strip Dilbert, who thinks he’s a genius but is really an insufferable kook.

1. Some women derive sexual pleasure from inserting the tips of ballpoint pens or other narrow objects into the Dilbert hole. Occasionally done by female office workers due to the widespread availability of pens in the office.

2. Did you read about what Scott Adams said on YouTube the other day? He’s such a Dilbert hole!

Dilbert hole by Unstable Sub-Genius February 25, 2023