ream of the ancient mariner

This requires the use of a dead albatross and a dirty old sailor. While engaged in doggystyle intercourse, tie the dead albatross around her neck, and while she is struggling to remove the filthy animal, quickly switch places with a dirty old sailor, who will give her a good jabbin' and the surprise of her life. Can be combined with the Rodeo. Perfect for breakup scenarios.

I wanted to end it with Jill, so I contracted a dirty old sailor, caught an albatross at the pier, and ended our relationship with a ream of the ancient mariner.

ream of the ancient mariner by Aplusbar October 17, 2006

The Ancient Ones

The Ancient Rulers of the Darkness, in a time before Time, when no Light existed. They who were slain by The Elder Gods, namely Marduk, begotten son of The Father Enki; Marduk who is Lord of Lords and Magician of Magicians, First Born and Ruler of The Elder Gods, Fashioner of The Magic Name, The Magic Word, The Magic Number and The Magic Shape and were cast into the eternal Abyss, The Netherworld, called Hades and Absu.

From the blood of Kingu, Ruler of The Ancient Ones, was the race of Man created and from the fluids of the vile Serpent Tiamat were the Heavens, the Stars and the Earth created.

The Ancient Ones keep constant watch over The Gates of Absu, forever seeking enterance into Our World, so that They may rule the Earth.

Wicked are those magicians that are skilled that they may rouse The Ancient Ones and rouse The Serpent of The Deep Waters, known as Cthulhu, and grant them access into Our World.

Grant thyself power by The Names of Elder Gods by reading and following to the letter the formulae contained within the pages of The Necronomicon, known as The Book of The Black Earth and The Book of the Dead, brought to us from the teachings and scripts of Abdul Alhazarad, known by many as The Mad Arab, paying particular attention to those written down within the pages of The Maklu Text and The Book of The Calling.

The Elder Gods did War in Heaven with The Ancient Ones, so as to create Light out of Supreme Darkness and the Heavens and The Earth and all that dwell therein.

The Ancient Ones by E April 6, 2005

the ancient ninja art of deep conditioning 

Uchiha Sasuke's way to keep his hair lookin' sexy. Naruto's way of making his hair weird and yellow

"i will use the ancient ninja art of deep conditioning to make my hair like sasuke-kun!"

the ancient ninja art of deep conditioning by delete no danna September 21, 2009

Raise the Ancient Golden Cage 

The feeling that a proposed relationship with the opposite sex is only going to lead to trouble in all 8 directions. Comes from a Russian proverb about setting free a beloved bird.

Raise the Ancient Golden Cage, Jerry, that woman is not who you think she is.

Raise the Ancient Golden Cage by silverseal September 18, 2011

defense of the ancients 

an old game, its acronym is dota

it has a fucking sequel jesus fucking christ

Guy 1: who the fuck plays defense of the ancients in 2017?

defense of the ancients by ProtoLink October 12, 2017

The Ancient One

He who shall not be named. If a human being even dares to whisper his name, a destructive forces will be brought upon us all.

He had seven sons, from which he shaped the earth, but one son went against him; Mester. He shaped the very essence of life as we know it from the stars and earth. Only he masters the Jinga. A capoeira battle unfolded between the two forces of divinity. In the end, The Ancient One was banished to the dark abyss that is the very core of the earth. But it came at a great price, Mester was flung out into the most outer regions og space, where he watches over us, in fear of approaching the earth, as it may awaken The Ancient One once again.

Thank you The Ancient One for shaping the Earth on which I stand and the food I eat. Thank you Mester for shaping life and feelings in your own image. I am eternally greatful.

The Ancient One by Worshipper of Mester December 2, 2016

defence of the ancients 

The game defence of the ancients is a pro map on the game Warcraft III the frozen throne. The most popular version is Dota Allstars.
Dota Allstars biggest pro is Hajsan, he pwans so much that he allways gets beyond god like after 3minuts max, but yea, don't blame him, he was born that way, pwaning evryone. Hajsan's best m8 is the legendary waazzaa, who pwans too.

Just a normal defence of the ancients match. The game just started and Hajsan choosed random (ofc) and got geomancer. He runs top and attacking 3 heroes standing at the tower.

Hajsan pwned ***** head for *** gold!
Hajsan drew first blood!
Hajsan pwned *** head for *** gold!
Double kill!
Hajsan pwned ******* for *** gold!
Tripple kill!
Hajsan got killing spree!

(and that's after 30 sec (before the creeps came, and notice, no asists!)

defence of the ancients by Hajsan's biggest fan August 24, 2009