Exit Pursued By A Bear

When you're having sex with a fat, burly, hairy gay man, and he informs you that he has AIDS.

David: Oh my gawwwd! This is the best sex I've ever had!!!

Bear: Mmmmm, oh by the way, I was just diagnosed with HIV.

David: What?! You know I only go bareback!!!

Bear: Don't you mean "bearback"? (chuckles)

David: Fuck you, man!

(David removes the bear's cock from his ass and quickly puts his clothes back on)

Bear: No, wait! Cum back! (aside) Tee-hee.

(Exit pursued by a bear)

by Baby Got Bareback November 23, 2009

Does a bear shit in the woods?

yes, but not a polar bear

Does a bear shit in the woods?

Not a polar bear

by trwells86 July 15, 2021

Pulling a Bear

To knowingly plan an event even though you know you're not going to make it.

To ditch in an dickheaded way.

Example:
Me: Bear you coming tonight?
Bear: Yeah! Ima be there!

That Night.
Me (over the phone): Where are you?
Bear: I told you I had plans!
Me: Wow are you Pulling a Bear...

by cdadger September 17, 2010

Fish in a Bear Suit

Originally taken from an episode of the now off-air childrens cartoon, Invader Zim, this phrase can be made into a very disgusting description. A fish in a bear suit is a disgusting hairy vagina.

I went to go down her but that bitch had a fish in a bear suit between her legs. Like damn!

by CeeJayMec February 24, 2010

Attacked by a Bear

When a night of overly excessive drinking ends in bodily injury and/or involuntary loss of nutrition or digestive substance. Typically this is considered losing to the attacking Bear.

It must be noted that it is possible to fend off a Bear Attack, however only the most experienced drinkers can walk away unharmed.

This term was coined by Employees wishing to discuss recent events without exposing unethical behaviors. For instance, if we were talking in a different language.

Billy Bob got "attacked by a bear" last night. It followed him around town all night but caught up to him on the highway. Be careful not to brush up against his car.

by V4RIRBL3 February 2, 2006

does a bear shit in the woods

Sarcastic response to any question that has an incredibly obvious answer. The humor lies in that you're mocking the person who asked the question by jokingly asking a question that has an obvious answer. See "Is the Pope Catholic".

Joe: Is Julio Jones good at football?
Clayton: Does a bear shit in the woods?

by Bob_Sag25 September 6, 2009

Tits on a bear

A hairy or unsightly situation to be in or witnessed.

We were tits on a bear until the police drove by and didn't see us hiding. The game was tits on a bear until they overcame that 20 point deficit in the last quarter.

by Boofing it December 1, 2020