Definition: someone who plows through their social media feed like some crazed madman.
This "species" can often be seen scrolling endlessly in their Instagram feed, spending no more than one second per post or story. For social speedsters, the act of sending a snap is no more than a 5 second ritualized process. Upon impulse, they whip their phone out of their pockets, instantly jump into snapchat, and without preparation, posts a selfie. And remember this is all within 5 seconds.
But the most characterizing feature that distinguishes social speedsters from regular folks is their expressionless faces when browsing emotion-inducing posts. You'd expect laughter from funny memes or a "wtffff" from controversial/disgusting posts, but nope. Just a deadpan reaction.
Some scholars suggest that social speedsters are more often than not desensitized by all the content (noise) they consume, hence leading them to form an indifferent attitude. Ultimately, the dopamine-rewarding nature of social media is what drives the insanely rapid browsing.
The current largest demographic of social speedsters are: Gen Z, Millennials.
This "species" can often be seen scrolling endlessly in their Instagram feed, spending no more than one second per post or story. For social speedsters, the act of sending a snap is no more than a 5 second ritualized process. Upon impulse, they whip their phone out of their pockets, instantly jump into snapchat, and without preparation, posts a selfie. And remember this is all within 5 seconds.
But the most characterizing feature that distinguishes social speedsters from regular folks is their expressionless faces when browsing emotion-inducing posts. You'd expect laughter from funny memes or a "wtffff" from controversial/disgusting posts, but nope. Just a deadpan reaction.
Some scholars suggest that social speedsters are more often than not desensitized by all the content (noise) they consume, hence leading them to form an indifferent attitude. Ultimately, the dopamine-rewarding nature of social media is what drives the insanely rapid browsing.
The current largest demographic of social speedsters are: Gen Z, Millennials.
To see an example, attend any college (post-COVID obv). You will be able to witness social speedsters and their smartphone-wielding dexterity in the flesh. Heck, you may even be one!
by Obv troll is obvious December 26, 2020
Get the Social speedster mug.When a person is paid, sent with an agenda, or goes on their own volition to sabotage and ruin another person's reputation by doing deliberately intolerable things to force reactions from them to make them look bad. Social hitmen, also Social Media Hitmen, go around "trolling" people to get them to use derogatory language, verbal abuse, physical abuse, or some other form of self defense to defend themselves, and then record or photo these actions to ruin their reputations to people in the media and in their lives.
These "hitmen" are totally and morally dead inside, are deplorable, and have no problems ruining your life and taking every cent you have just for an easy paycheck. They will block you from where you need to go, grope and sexually assault you, call you terrible things on your media pages, and be genuinely intolerable in order to achieve some agenda, get a criminals paycheck, or just do it for their own sick fun. These people, like paparazzi, never stop, never rest, until they get that sweet demon release and ruin your life.
As of now, 2020, there is no legal defense to stop a Social Hitman other than self control.
These "hitmen" are totally and morally dead inside, are deplorable, and have no problems ruining your life and taking every cent you have just for an easy paycheck. They will block you from where you need to go, grope and sexually assault you, call you terrible things on your media pages, and be genuinely intolerable in order to achieve some agenda, get a criminals paycheck, or just do it for their own sick fun. These people, like paparazzi, never stop, never rest, until they get that sweet demon release and ruin your life.
As of now, 2020, there is no legal defense to stop a Social Hitman other than self control.
Guy 1: Did you hear what A Herd did to JD? She ruined his career.
Guy 2: That Social Hitman? She did it for the attention and the money, no question.
Apologist on TV: I am sorry for using the F word in a derogatory manner to that person last week. A Social Media Hitman was harassing me in emails, private messages, and sending me inappropriate sexual pictures of themselves and others, and when I tried to block them and tell them to stop, they kept at it until I went off at them. I am sorry to the people that saw it, and I am not bigoted nor intolerant, just this person posted their screenshot of me telling them off and it was taken out of context. I shouldn't have said it, and I am sorry.
Corporation: There is a person we want to take down on their social media pages and ruin their reputation to make them look bad politically, allowing us to gain more social support. We will give you 10,000 USD to find a way to make this person look like a bigot, a racist, a deviant, or sexually abusive. You can develop a relationship and betray them, or anything to achieve this goal.
Social Media Hitman: Shouldn't be too hard; I can use private servers, networks, and follow and harass them until they react.
Concerned Citizen: What can we do against these social hitmen?
Concerned Citizen 2: Absolutely nothing. you just have to ignore, block, restrict, and hire security to keep them away. There is no known legal defense to stop a Social (Media) Hitman other than self control. Humans 2020
Guy 2: That Social Hitman? She did it for the attention and the money, no question.
Apologist on TV: I am sorry for using the F word in a derogatory manner to that person last week. A Social Media Hitman was harassing me in emails, private messages, and sending me inappropriate sexual pictures of themselves and others, and when I tried to block them and tell them to stop, they kept at it until I went off at them. I am sorry to the people that saw it, and I am not bigoted nor intolerant, just this person posted their screenshot of me telling them off and it was taken out of context. I shouldn't have said it, and I am sorry.
Corporation: There is a person we want to take down on their social media pages and ruin their reputation to make them look bad politically, allowing us to gain more social support. We will give you 10,000 USD to find a way to make this person look like a bigot, a racist, a deviant, or sexually abusive. You can develop a relationship and betray them, or anything to achieve this goal.
Social Media Hitman: Shouldn't be too hard; I can use private servers, networks, and follow and harass them until they react.
Concerned Citizen: What can we do against these social hitmen?
Concerned Citizen 2: Absolutely nothing. you just have to ignore, block, restrict, and hire security to keep them away. There is no known legal defense to stop a Social (Media) Hitman other than self control. Humans 2020
by MCPKG December 27, 2020
Get the Social (Media) Hitman mug.by crossworder January 12, 2021
Get the Social media mug.discovered by popular streamer, corpse husband. keeps someone away from your pool. discovered during the covid 19 pandemic.
by lilacflowers January 16, 2021
Get the Social Distancing mug.Socialism: a type of society where the government oppresses the people instead of the people oppressing each other.
by Words do not exist January 19, 2021
Get the Socialism mug.An extremely weak and insecure individual that blocks someone they have an issue with on social media and then proceeds to use that same social media platform to post negative status updates or emotional rants directed at the person(s) they blocked. The social media coward engages in these acts on the assumption that the person(s) they are referencing and taking "shots" at likely will not see posts nor be able to respond.
See also, "Internet Coward"
See also, "Internet Coward"
Jack was dumped by Jill at Starbucks this morning. Afterwards, Jack went home, cried, and posted several status updates on Facebook directed at Jill explaining why he had to break up with her. Being the social media coward that he is, Jack blocked Jill on Facebook so she could not respond and tell the truth, thus Jack was able to successfully play the victim.
by FloorBageo January 21, 2021
Get the Social Media Coward mug.Those people who no longer are allowed on major Social Media platforms, despite never breaking the Community Standards. Attempting to create their own platforms results in the shadowy players getting ISP'S and Server Hosts to deny them service, thus leaving them essentially voiceless in today's society. Also see "Zucked"
by PonchoLongshanks January 25, 2021
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