Take my Jesus

Take my peace or sanity, piss me off, make me lose my shit.

1. She was all up in my face trying to take my Jesus.

Note: can also be used as “lose my Jesus”. Ex- If he doesn’t shut up I’m gonna lose my Jesus!

by Jilly845 June 7, 2018

50 shades of jesus

A sex story between Jesus and his followers made by a sinning fuck face. and who also wants to piss of his/her parents because they are christian.

Hey did you read the sequel of 50 shades of Jesus? "50 more shades of jesus"

by Blue_Amore June 8, 2018

jesus antonio martinez

Greatest man you can ever meet.Strongest man you can ever meet. Always picks the right girlfriend and a girl who has him is the luckiest girl in the world.

Jesus Antonio Martinez is awesome he is a pro at basketball he is so great maybe the greatest person i ever met and has a beautiful girlfriend she is so lucky to have him he is dreamy and really strong .

by green gazes May 10, 2018

jesus jerk off

After finishing nonutnovember and glancing at the picture of Jesus being crucified you immediately cream your jimmies. Such an event happens ounce every blue moon and is usually followed by an isis beheading.

Damn bro I had a jesus jerk off last night I was cleaning it up for hours.

by Overitus_Manhadalitus February 5, 2018

Jesus would be an army

The Fandom of the boy group BTS is called ARMY. Some armys made up the phrase "Jesus would be an army", because that's a fact.

Jesus would be an army. PERIODT.

by KIMCHIENTERTAINMENT June 19, 2020

Jesus Christ on a crutch!

Simply means, "O fuck!" or, "O shit!".

Jesus Christ on a crutch! you shouldn't have done that.

by Telephony2 June 29, 2023

2 inches for jesus

"2 Inches for Jesus" is the appropriate distance between a girl and boy during a dance, often seen at school proms.

2 inches for jesus is used in a sentence to inform people the correct distance between them to dance, as to not be too provocative

"Leave two inches for jesus" said the principle at the school dance

by Gonkaholic March 6, 2023