horizontalitis

N. - the inclination to fill up (‘inflame’) any flat, open surface; ‘clutterize’, or, the desire to lay down no matter the circumstances.

Afflicted with horizontalitis, she was headed for an appearance on Hoarders, as she could not keep any area of her home free of clutter.

He suffered from horizontalitis and took the phrase “laying down on the job” to a whole new level.

by CramApple1999 March 29, 2023

Horizontal Shortbus

When both parties are making retarded faces at one another, while simultaneously having sex in the missionary position.

Bae, Horizontal Shortbus and chill?

My boyfriend only ever wants to do the horizontal shortbus with me.

by Desi Dukes July 9, 2017

horizontal intergration

To fuck horizontally

horizontal intergration; Having sexual intercourse in a horizontal manner

guy 1: hey who was that girl?
guy 2: just some girl I horizontally integrated with
guy 1: ahh some good ol horizontal integration, fornicate brother

by jlhi99 April 20, 2018

Horizontal bar

A sport construction out of metal with a horizontal metal bar in the middle where you can try to to wind your body around it in several positions and directions.

Being loved by german sports teachers at school. Probably invented by the devil himself.

Statistics say that every fifth student can leave the sports hall without crushed balls.

Teacher: You! Come to the horizontal bar.
My balls: Ah, shit – here we go again…

by EroxHD [YT] October 27, 2019

Keepin' it Horizontal

To maintain a causal relationship with someone

"What about you and them? What's going on there?"

"We just keepin' it horizontal."

by @definition April 13, 2024

horizontal

drinking so much alcohol that all you can think about is having to lie down on the ground, right then and there, horizontal.

“yo are you going to drink with us tonight?”
“YES, i have full intentions of being horizontal!”
“hell yeah! black out or back out! i’m gonna get horizontal too!!”

by finmtaf January 2, 2021

horizontal top hat

A sexually move for hot ass citizens that need a break from calling normal sex "normal"...

"So hey we should to horizontal top hat"
"sounds awesome when you put it that way"

by Dawnrose February 18, 2018