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How Christians Read the Bible

By presupposing it's truth and then create a narrative that is parallel to the text and then accepting this adjacent narrative AS TRUTH... Regardless of what the text actually says.
Hym "And then what they do is believe the narrative that is constructed around the text... In spite of the FACT that it is a manifestation of their own mind. So, it doesn't matter WHAT YOU SAY... As long as the conclusion is that the religion is both true and good. And it looks something like this:

Dr. JeepJorp "Flabbity florbity flip flop! Everyone KNOWS that flabbity florbity flip flop and that = the Bible true and good!"

Sheeple "Hey! I'm everyone! You're right! I know that, I mean, come on. Do you think I don't know that flabbity florbity flip flop? Everyone know it!"

Hym "And that's how Christians read the Bible."
by Hym Iam June 14, 2024
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Christian

A funny guy that bets people he will make roller coasters! He has a really weird ringtone
1. I called Christian

2. *No answer*
3. Hi if your trying to call Christian u have the wrong number
by Hockey_Funny_True June 1, 2020
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Christian

A pyramid scheme based on a philosophy that was fairly progressive 2000 years ago. It has been rendered obsolete by modern scientific understanding largely due to its inability to resolve its inconsistencies through intelligently-applied critical thinking. It now serves as a means of deterring social and political advancement and as a tax on the gullible.
The christian-controlled majority in congress voted to withdraw federal funds to help support financially disadvantaged infants, reminding the public that the babies will go to heaven.
by anajafpour April 21, 2022
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Christian

Christian is a big back b!tch who judges other peoples burgers 🙄
Big back - someone who is perceived as overweight or who eats a lot of food.

Christian - big back b!tch
by Jx.lxnx07 July 30, 2025
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Christian Sammie Dawes

Someone sexy who is, intelligent and super ambitious.
“He was such a Christian Sammie Dawes”
by cracker7777 April 1, 2024
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christian masters

a fgt with long hair and no swag and is often abused by a guy named noah
by asdfjohn May 28, 2014
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Christian Claps

A professional NPL 2 player who has scored 264 goals in the NPL and has gotten MOTM 37 times in his squad.
OMG!!
IS THAT CHRISTIAN CLAPS!!
by BISS999 November 1, 2022
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