Crumpet snatcher

An extremely offensive British offensive, meaning to steal ones freshly buttered crumpets

"Did you steal my tea?" You're such a crumpet snatcher!"

by Yllom.gollom October 4, 2016

buttery crumpet

When you slab that butter on the crumpet and it melts all the way through to the plate.

That was such a buttery crumpet I licked the plate afterwards.

by anonymous August 18, 2022

Crumpet muffin

The thing kids say to be cool instead of saying mother fucker.

You crumpet muffin!

by Yolo beast yolo loo April 24, 2014

Sticky Crumpet

When a girl does her hair up in Princess Leia buns and she fellates you and a friend until you both jizz on the buns.

Me and Michael gave my girl a sticky crumpet the other evening.

by Bigjoe22?? December 30, 2021

crumpet dodger

A man who avoids women; typically because he is a homosexual.

"Hey Jamie, you massive crumpet dodger"

by Joni-K July 6, 2016

crumpet strumpet

UK old woman who sits around eating crumpets and flirting excessively online in chatrooms with anyone who will talk to her.

The crumpet strumpet was overly aggressive in chat.

by Goonie's Revenge September 23, 2023