Story City Iowa

A town in central Iowa with a population of about 3500. Surrounded by 500 miles of corn in all directions, located right on highway 35. Home to some of the most condescending asshole hillbillies you'll ever meet. Some of the attractions of this town include Kum and Go, The Carousel(which is only interesting to Chinese tourist), and the two parks located in the middle of town. The only reason anyone ever comes to this town is to stop and eat at one of the many poorly managed restaurant along the interstate. Living here is atrocious, and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone with a steady income and a good head on their shoulders. The people there are weird, deranged, and want nothing to do with outsiders. The cops are absolute assholes, and the school system is an utter joke. And living there, even for a short period of time, will bore you to death. The only thing to do in Story City is to be a drunken, drug addicted hick. I would recommend avoiding this town, or any town north of Ames along interstate 35, until at least Albert Lea, Minn.

Tourist: So what do people from Story City Iowa do?
Story City Resident: Umm, not much, I've pretty much been sitting in my apartment smoking Crystal Meth for the past 10 years. So, that's about all there is to do here.

by ChicagoTribune May 6, 2013

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