by Unknown1111234 February 2, 2010
Get the Two camels in a tiny car mug.the act of using the index and middle finger in a v shape to hide emotional and or physical pain. at times the right hand of the user can be noticeably shaking beyond control and the nose of the individual can be heard sniffing.
by plumboo December 31, 2005
Get the two finger salute mug.Literally the funniest shit ever. it's even funnier than a scientist who has turned himself into a pickle.
by Notmyrealname69420 September 23, 2020
Get the two identical rocks in the desert mug.when at a party/school disco, two male teenage(often univited friends (best mates and loners) who arent getting into the party and generally have distain for the music played or hosts of the party, often by shouting "two man mosh pit!", start moshing and jumping into eachother violently for a brief period startling the people sitting on sofas singing to girls aloud.
"Hey Ed, why did we go to this girls party. The music sucks"
"You know what I'm thinking?"
"TWO MAN MOSH PIT!"
"You know what I'm thinking?"
"TWO MAN MOSH PIT!"
by Billy Messerschmitt October 26, 2008
Get the Two Man Mosh Pit mug.The beginning scentence in a series of political and economic jokes. "You have two cows..." jokes began as a parody of typical intro-course material in college level economics featuring a "farmer in a moneyless society, using his cattle and produce to trade with his neighbors."
The cows are used as a metaphor for currency, capital, means of production, and property.
"Two cows" jokes typically portray an outsider's view on many cultural and economic issues using paradox, and sarcasm.
The cows are used as a metaphor for currency, capital, means of production, and property.
"Two cows" jokes typically portray an outsider's view on many cultural and economic issues using paradox, and sarcasm.
You have two cows ...
ANARCHISM: You have two cows. The cows decide you have no right to do anything with their milk and leave to form their own society.
CANADIANISM: You have two cows. The bank takes both of them, shoots one, throws away the milk and you shoot yourself.
SOVIET: You have two cows. You count them and realize you have
four cows. You drink more Vodka. You count the cows again and realize you have eleventy six cows. You drink even more Vodka. After a while, you realize that eleventy isn't a real number. You count the cows again and have two cows. You open another bottle of Vodka and try to drown the loss of eleventy four cows.
DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. They outvote you 2-1 to ban all meat and dairy products. You go bankrupt.
UNITED NATIONISM: You have two cows. France vetoes you from milking them. The United States and Britain veto the cows from milking you. New Zealand abstains.
FRISBEETARIANISM: You have two cows. One of them flies up on the roof and gets stuck. You hope the government provides cow ladders.
Intel Pentium 60 - A80501-60
You have 2.0000000056987983 cows.
In the marketing department
Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of two thousand millicows!
Fact
You really have 0 cows.
ANARCHISM: You have two cows. The cows decide you have no right to do anything with their milk and leave to form their own society.
CANADIANISM: You have two cows. The bank takes both of them, shoots one, throws away the milk and you shoot yourself.
SOVIET: You have two cows. You count them and realize you have
four cows. You drink more Vodka. You count the cows again and realize you have eleventy six cows. You drink even more Vodka. After a while, you realize that eleventy isn't a real number. You count the cows again and have two cows. You open another bottle of Vodka and try to drown the loss of eleventy four cows.
DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. They outvote you 2-1 to ban all meat and dairy products. You go bankrupt.
UNITED NATIONISM: You have two cows. France vetoes you from milking them. The United States and Britain veto the cows from milking you. New Zealand abstains.
FRISBEETARIANISM: You have two cows. One of them flies up on the roof and gets stuck. You hope the government provides cow ladders.
Intel Pentium 60 - A80501-60
You have 2.0000000056987983 cows.
In the marketing department
Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of two thousand millicows!
Fact
You really have 0 cows.
by Lillic0rr April 30, 2006
Get the You have two cows ... mug.(speaking in native accent) Hey there have you seen those two one guys? We need to go get us some Budweiser.
by sleeBall September 23, 2008
Get the those two one guys mug.Alt: Two Can Jackie Chan
A rather embarrassing (for friends present who are sober / can handle their drink) and woeful condition in which the sufferer changes from a passive to an aggressive personality type having consumed a couple of pints of piss weak lager. The afflicted light weight can be regularly observed in bars and clubs, squaring up to people who are considerably taller, stronger and more adept at martial arts than they are. These 'confrontations' inevitably lead to the 'Two Can' Action Man receiving a swift kicking, necessitating an equally predictable detour to a casualty department. Also seen on execrable Police based TV documentaries adopting unconvincing martial arts poses, a la Karate Kid, in front of bored Police Officers. Just who are you trying to fool? The Police will tazer and break you!!!
A rather embarrassing (for friends present who are sober / can handle their drink) and woeful condition in which the sufferer changes from a passive to an aggressive personality type having consumed a couple of pints of piss weak lager. The afflicted light weight can be regularly observed in bars and clubs, squaring up to people who are considerably taller, stronger and more adept at martial arts than they are. These 'confrontations' inevitably lead to the 'Two Can' Action Man receiving a swift kicking, necessitating an equally predictable detour to a casualty department. Also seen on execrable Police based TV documentaries adopting unconvincing martial arts poses, a la Karate Kid, in front of bored Police Officers. Just who are you trying to fool? The Police will tazer and break you!!!
Mate 1: Jim's been to hospital again!
Mate 2: Yeah the twat! He was round at mine and had two cans of Stella. Next thing you know he tried to chop a brick in half with his hand.
Mate 1: Not as bad as the time he spent two weeks in traction after he had two glasses of cider, decided he was hard and nutted that bouncer in the chest....What a Two Can Van Damme.
Mate 2: Yeah the twat! He was round at mine and had two cans of Stella. Next thing you know he tried to chop a brick in half with his hand.
Mate 1: Not as bad as the time he spent two weeks in traction after he had two glasses of cider, decided he was hard and nutted that bouncer in the chest....What a Two Can Van Damme.
by TheFoolOnTheHillAnarchy October 20, 2012
Get the Two Can Van Damme mug.