obese turtle

After President trump got all agro about losing the 2020 election, a pundit on CNN referred to him as looking like an obese turtle.

Donald trump looks like an obese turtle on its back, flailing in the Sun.

by MutualContemptSociety November 20, 2022

turtle-eenie-weenie

An extravagant method of describing something so cute and minute that it forces the exclaimer to explain it in absolute nonsensical reptilian terms.

oh my goodness this babies toes are so turtle-eenie-weenies

by vapegodalbert April 22, 2022

Squirtle turtle

When you squeeze a wee out so hard that you shit yourself standing up

ah bro i just squeezed a piss out so hard i squirtle turtled

by knee swinger April 24, 2022

turtle heart

A little turtle who Carries a heart in it’s mouth, where did the heart come from? nobody knows.

Hey that’s a nice turtle heart you got there dude!
Thanks, it just came last week and I need to keep all eyes on it or it will start growing it’s heart collection.

by Q woo kyjtjtjjtjttjtj April 26, 2022

Turtles

Motherfuckers that made us start using paper straws instead of plastic ones.

“Hey, can I have a straw?”

“We only have paper, is that fine?”

“No, turtle fucker. It’s not fucking fine.”

“Turtles caused it, i didn’t.”

by ItalianMafiaMan May 2, 2022

turtle muffin

One who often arrives late due to walking slow, but is often regarded as being as sweet or soft as a muffin.

Ashley is such a turtle muffin, always casually getting to work late but while catching men's attention with her sweetness.

by TeamFSP May 3, 2022

turtles

what the kid in the zombie makeup likes

i like turtles

by EU🅱️🅱️OUR May 6, 2022