Get the United States Of Sentencesu mug.Origin: First officially documented in the year of our Lord 2024 by Mike K. of Redondo Beach — a man whose voice was smooth as silk and whose spiritual awakening is constantly being tested by schmo's playing with their phones in meetings, and weak coffee. Blessings be unto him.
An evolved species of AA old-timer who walks the fine line between enlightenment and homicide. The Bleeding Statesman is a spiritual hybrid — part Elder Statesman, part Bleeding Deacon — combining hard-won wisdom with low-key exasperation and an intolerance for bullshit.
With decades of sobriety under their belt, they’ve seen it all — the steps, the slogans, the cycles — and still manage to show up (mostly on time). They carry a sharp spiritual toolkit and just enough restraint to stay out of jail. Think Zen master, but with mild caffeine withdrawal and unresolved group conscience trauma.
They don’t judge — they perform character assessments.
They meditate — on que with "I cant believe this b*tch is sharing this again"
They’re spiritually grounded — but always five seconds away from leaving.
An evolved species of AA old-timer who walks the fine line between enlightenment and homicide. The Bleeding Statesman is a spiritual hybrid — part Elder Statesman, part Bleeding Deacon — combining hard-won wisdom with low-key exasperation and an intolerance for bullshit.
With decades of sobriety under their belt, they’ve seen it all — the steps, the slogans, the cycles — and still manage to show up (mostly on time). They carry a sharp spiritual toolkit and just enough restraint to stay out of jail. Think Zen master, but with mild caffeine withdrawal and unresolved group conscience trauma.
They don’t judge — they perform character assessments.
They meditate — on que with "I cant believe this b*tch is sharing this again"
They’re spiritually grounded — but always five seconds away from leaving.
“I watched Mike meditate for like 40 minutes before the meeting… but then he snapped and told the newcomer to stop reading the promises like it was a TED Talk. That man’s a textbook Bleeding Statesman.”
“The dude’s got 30 years, quotes the Big Book and Marcus Aurelius, and still glares when someone’s late. Total Bleeding Statesman.”
“He sat through 10 minutes of announcements grumbling… then muttered, ‘This isn’t a PTA meeting,’ and walked out. Bleeding Statesman energy all day.”
“She shared for 25 minutes about her cat, and he just sat there blinking. Then he whispered, ‘Tradition Five, not storytime,’ and stared into the void. Certified Bleeding Statesman.”
“The dude’s got 30 years, quotes the Big Book and Marcus Aurelius, and still glares when someone’s late. Total Bleeding Statesman.”
“He sat through 10 minutes of announcements grumbling… then muttered, ‘This isn’t a PTA meeting,’ and walked out. Bleeding Statesman energy all day.”
“She shared for 25 minutes about her cat, and he just sat there blinking. Then he whispered, ‘Tradition Five, not storytime,’ and stared into the void. Certified Bleeding Statesman.”
by Sponsorus Maximus April 6, 2025
Get the Bleeding Statesman mug.Related Words
United States Of America Was Lended The Word Of "Pisces" For Hellstroms <Angel Jose Robles, Also Known As, Hellstrom Hellstrom, Hellstromismu, Holi, Holism, Holismu, And Messenger Add Oak> From The Country Of Sweden
United States Of America Was Lended The Word Of "Pisces" For Hellstroms <Angel Jose Robles, Also Known As, Hellstrom Hellstrom, Hellstromismu, Holi, Holism, Holismu, And Messenger Add Oak> From The Country Of Sweden
by TheSpartanicaOfAnyHellstromu3e April 9, 2025
Get the United States Of America Was Lended The Word Of "Pisces" For Hellstroms <Angel Jose Robles, Also Known As, Hellstrom Hellstrom, Hellstromismu, Holi, Holism, Holismu, And Messenger Add Oak> From The Country Of Sweden mug.by clab420 May 9, 2025
Get the 49 states mug.by clab420 May 12, 2025
Get the 49 states mug.the 64 states map is a joke map of the united states published on december 15, 2023 by the webcomic xkcd which reads "geography challenge: can you label all the states?" just google it to find the image of it.
at first glance, it looks like a normal united states map with all distinctly-shaped states like california, idaho, texas, minnesota, michigan, ohio (who can forget that one?), florida, maryland, etc.
however when you glance closer, you realize a bunch of fake states have been added, most of them being in the west. most of them look like wyoming and colorado copies, due to them being rectangles. (why couldn't there have been a second florida- wait, nevermind)
the map got labeled by various people, coming up with hilarious names for the states.
here are what look like fake states.
fake state 1: between oregon and california. somewhat rectangle shaped, except for the west coast part.
fake state 2: to the northeast of nevada. almost rectangle shaped.
fake state 3: between arizona and new mexico. nicknamed "newer mexico."
fake state 4: to the west of north dakota.
fake state 5: to the west of south dakota.
now here's the hard part: the multiple rectangles. even i don't know which one is the actual wyoming and colorado, they're all rectangle shaped.
at first glance, it looks like a normal united states map with all distinctly-shaped states like california, idaho, texas, minnesota, michigan, ohio (who can forget that one?), florida, maryland, etc.
however when you glance closer, you realize a bunch of fake states have been added, most of them being in the west. most of them look like wyoming and colorado copies, due to them being rectangles. (why couldn't there have been a second florida- wait, nevermind)
the map got labeled by various people, coming up with hilarious names for the states.
here are what look like fake states.
fake state 1: between oregon and california. somewhat rectangle shaped, except for the west coast part.
fake state 2: to the northeast of nevada. almost rectangle shaped.
fake state 3: between arizona and new mexico. nicknamed "newer mexico."
fake state 4: to the west of north dakota.
fake state 5: to the west of south dakota.
now here's the hard part: the multiple rectangles. even i don't know which one is the actual wyoming and colorado, they're all rectangle shaped.
fake state 6: to the east of idaho. not sure if it's the wyoming, or a fake state.
fake state 7: to the northeast of utah. could be a wyoming.
fake state 8: to the west of nebraska. more square-shaped. could be a wyoming.
fake state 9: to the west of nebraska and kansas. could be a colorado.
fake state 10: to the east of utah. could be a colorado.
back to the more recognizable non wyoming/colorado states.
fake state 11: between south dakota and nebraska.
fake state 12: an arkansas clone. between missouri/arkansas and louisiana, depending on which one you think is the real arkansas.
fake state 13: a tennessee clone. between kentucky/tennessee and the tops of mississippi and alabama, depending on which one you think is the real tennessee.
fake state 14: between indiana and ohio.
fake state 15: between north and south carolina. nicknamed "central carolina" because it's in between the two.
fake state 16: between new hampshire and maine. nicknamed "evil new hampshire" by someone on the internet.
my older twin claire showed me the 64 states map. i couldn't tell which one was the actual wyoming.
fake state 7: to the northeast of utah. could be a wyoming.
fake state 8: to the west of nebraska. more square-shaped. could be a wyoming.
fake state 9: to the west of nebraska and kansas. could be a colorado.
fake state 10: to the east of utah. could be a colorado.
back to the more recognizable non wyoming/colorado states.
fake state 11: between south dakota and nebraska.
fake state 12: an arkansas clone. between missouri/arkansas and louisiana, depending on which one you think is the real arkansas.
fake state 13: a tennessee clone. between kentucky/tennessee and the tops of mississippi and alabama, depending on which one you think is the real tennessee.
fake state 14: between indiana and ohio.
fake state 15: between north and south carolina. nicknamed "central carolina" because it's in between the two.
fake state 16: between new hampshire and maine. nicknamed "evil new hampshire" by someone on the internet.
my older twin claire showed me the 64 states map. i couldn't tell which one was the actual wyoming.
by connecticut 765 June 16, 2025
Get the 64 states map mug.The future name of the small piece of land surrounding Washington DC once the United States formally falls, when we are no longer able to pay our debt due to the corrupt mismanagement of public funds for decades, and most of the land that currently constitutes the United States of America is sold off.
I bet they'll make YMCA the national anthem of the Homocratic States of America!
It's time to get serious and quit putting in makeup wearing drama queens in the White House, okay?
It's time to get serious and quit putting in makeup wearing drama queens in the White House, okay?
by Publius0987 August 18, 2025
Get the Homocratic States of America mug.