asphyxiated turtle head

pronounced- ass fix ee eight ed ter tul hed, which is the state of a mans penis when attempting to pee after having been in an uncomfortably cold temperature for a range of time. Asphyxiated turtle head can even cause pain in the tip and give the sensation of still having urine that needs to be expelled.

"damn this asphyxiated turtle head! ive been forcing out drops of piss for 3 minutes!"

by MercWidaMouth November 14, 2010

turtles

Worse than llamas because llamas are awesome.

turtles are noobier than llamas

by Acritus April 20, 2017

Turtle

The opposite of a cheetah.

It took the turtle most of the day to finish the race, but at least the turtle had no quit in him/her, even if it failed.

by The Original Agahnim July 30, 2021

Turtle

A nickname for Emilee Sheets, basically the best turtle in existence. If you contradict this you may be sued and given a life sentence.

"We'll fuckin kill anyone who opposes the turtle"

by Andrew Colley June 30, 2019

turtle

When a girl tucks under her blankets while a guy has anal sex with her.

toddino: my girlfriend did the turtle with me last night and it's so fucking hot
lukey: omg bro lucky

by yourmotherishotxoxo May 17, 2023

Cringe turtle

When you hear something so cringe that your heat retracts into your chest like a turtle

Someone: Hey I just took part in my schools talent show, I sang Riptide on my ukulele.

You, probably: Damn, thats so cringe my shoulders touch my ears like a cringe turtle

by _goose March 5, 2021

Turtle Penis

When you get out of a pool and your penis is so small it looks like a turtle penis!

That dude just got out of that pool, I bet he has a turtle penis.

by GAYturtleSEX July 8, 2020