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Melvin

Thug ass n***a
Watch out for those Melvins. They will fuck you up.
by Melvins and mondays April 24, 2023
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Melvin

Melvin (also known as the chinese emperor Xi Ling) is revolutionary for the scientific world.

Melvin is the first neandertal reborn in modern time, this is made possible through his love for Billys pan pizza, which reincarnated him in 2008.

He has a total of 2 braincells that are both fighting for third place. Both his chromosones and height in centimeters are 176.

His name was declared in 2009 as another word for autism.
Melvin has a history of anger issues related to the popular game For Honor. Symptoms of Melvin being close to the game can cause him to scream racial slurs, brutally molest his microphone and destroy keyboards.

To prevent these agrevating symptoms he needs to have a parental figure within 10 meters of him at all times, and making him play at night has proven him to calm down.

His haircut (a buzzcut) has granted him access to engage in conversations with monkeys such as chimpanzees, orangutangs and the infamous Herr Nillson.

We suspect that he was raised by monkeys in his youth, which causes this abnormal behaviour.
Last but not least, his monkey based raising causes him to grow hair like a true chimp. He startet the rumors of bigfoot when he was skating and trying to do a macaroni tripple mcflurry flip with a backslick.
Person 1: Is he aucustic?
Person 2: Yes hes a bit on the Melvin side of the spectrum.

Patient: Give it to me straight doc, how did my autism test go?
Doctor: Im afraid that you tested 100% positive for Melvin'tism.
Patient: Dag nab it

Melvin: I passed the test. It told me that im artistic.
Doctor: No it said that you are autistic, is your name Melvin my any chance?

Person 1: Is that a monkey?
Person 2: No I think thats Melvin?
Melvin: Ooga Booga
by Xi Ping January 22, 2024
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Melvin

A weirdo, loser, freak. Someone you would not want to be seen with in public.
"I don't want to hang out with them dad, they're total Melvins"
by Phlembzombie April 29, 2024
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Melvin

a guy with a big, juicy and a tasty ballsack.
oh look over there, that guy is so melvin!
by gayman69429 April 17, 2020
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Melvined

To be scammed by someone who is clueless they're clueless.
Dr. Paul: "Hi Lori, you're looking a little upset this morning. Care to talk about it?" "Oh Dr. Paul...I don't know what to do...this guy Melvin... just cost me hundreds of dollars in service fees by lying to my credit card provider, telling them I never sent him his order. But I did...I really did. I had all my paperwork work proving I did, but the bank took his side regardless and won't pay me. I've been...oh....ahhhh...I've been Melvined"....
by Reinhardt Scrumschnutzel August 31, 2025
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Melvin

The very definition of an awesome person. Someone who everyone looks up to, aspires to be, but knows they can almost never become. Handsome, charming, charismatic to a fault but people are most drawn to Melvin’s authenticity. Likeable, funny, a man’s man & a woman’s man.

Fiercely loyal and passionate lover.

Own a Melvin today or get owned by a Melvin.
You’re such a ‘Melvin’ - you’re making me blush!
by X.treme November 23, 2021
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Melvin

"Dad, that mean girl in gym class gave me a Melvin today!"
by Snarts September 6, 2018
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