Alabamian Washing Machine

When your partner is in the washing machine and you insert your penis inside her vagina while the washing machine is active. Not to be confused with the Reverse Alabamian Washing Machine.

GF: "Babe, give me an Alabamian Washing Machine!"
BF: "Ok, get in the washing machine"

by Capital_K December 10, 2024

The candy machine

The candy machine was a device used for masturbation in ancient times and was presented by a kid named Elias on youtube, he was the creator of this masturbation device that yanked your balls and tickled the groin. Elias went on to die from internal groin bleeding....

"I just bought a brand new version of The candy machine!"
"That's fucking awesome, just remember to oil up so it doesn't rip the testies"

by jepeliusmilo December 18, 2024

testicles powered by machine guns

testicles that are powered by machine guns!

his testicles were so fucking strong that they could be powered by machine guns
testicles powered by machine guns are awesome!

by Tower0fdreams January 19, 2025

Deus sex machina

Phenomena where the most unbreedable character in fiction gets laid for the purpose of plot or bad writing

(insert the most annoying character in fiction) is getting laid can you believe it?

fucking Deus sex machina

by evil molester February 11, 2026

Cavan Card Machine

The act of ejaculating onto a credit card. Female companion then proceeds to snort the jizz like a line of cocaine.

Did you hear he got a Cavan Card Machine in the front of his car last week.

by 7soggyciaran February 19, 2026

Mighty TV dream machine

The Nine Network

The mighty TV dream machine was the home of the greatest variety shows in Australia. Now it is a lifestyle network focusing on housing & real estate shows. At least they have a good taste in programming since they don’t often air too many trashy reality shows.

by ScarceWindow180 March 19, 2026

Energy Directed Machine 750W

A 750-watt integrated directed-energy system, distinguished from the "Igniter" series by its complete, turnkey industrial design. Where an "Igniter" might be a component or modular system, a "Machine" includes everything: power supply, cooling system, control interface, safety enclosures, and often automated targeting. The 750W Machine is a production tool for heavy manufacturing—cutting thick plate, welding structural components, and performing thermal processing. In the military context, the 750W Machine is a "system" rather than a "weapon," which means it's easier to deploy and harder to regulate. The difference between a factory tool and a weapon is often just the software that tells it where to aim.

Energy Directed Machine 750W Example: "The factory's 750W Energy Directed Machine was sold as a precision cutter for shipbuilding. The same machine, with different software, was installed on a naval vessel a month later. The only difference was the targeting algorithm."

by Abzugal March 20, 2026