Cringe turtle

When you hear something so cringe that your heat retracts into your chest like a turtle

Someone: Hey I just took part in my schools talent show, I sang Riptide on my ukulele.

You, probably: Damn, thats so cringe my shoulders touch my ears like a cringe turtle

by _goose March 05, 2021

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punch the turtle

To attempt something that does have a small chance of success - but will likely end in failure and pain.

Did you hear how Josh and Christel are trying to create new slang? They're trying to punch the turtle with that...

by JBonesMcGee March 30, 2019

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thirsty turtle

(n.) term used to describe chinless, humanoid species found in Northern Louisiana. usually female, these creatures resemble a turtle who lost her shell. Despite her FAS features, she will be full of an ignorant, white trash pride and sense of superiority, which will make her feel entitled and desires among a group of male peers who would stick in a dead dog so long as it was still warm.

I can't believe Maria Elena Cimino is working here again but she is a thirsty turtle for those auto-sales managers.

by firecracker4u March 13, 2017

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turtle eggs

when 10 guys each put their nutsacks in one man's butthole and ejaculate at the same time

hesus: dammn those turtle eggs last night are what keep me from committing suicide.

by the titty ytickler February 22, 2021

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Sigma Turtling

When you bring yourself to the edge of a climax while simultaneously holding in a poop then release the load and turd at the same time and reach a Nirvana-like state of being

"Hey bro, last night I was totally Sigma Turtling to Oprah Winfrey!"
"Sweet bro!"

by DoctaPurp July 11, 2024

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