Melvin (also known as the chinese emperor Xi Ling) is revolutionary for the scientific world.
Melvin is the first neandertal reborn in modern time, this is made possible through his love for Billys pan pizza, which reincarnated him in 2008.
He has a total of 2 braincells that are both fighting for third place. Both his chromosones and height in centimeters are 176.
His name was declared in 2009 as another word for autism.
Melvin has a history of anger issues related to the popular game For Honor. Symptoms of Melvin being close to the game can cause him to scream racial slurs, brutally molest his microphone and destroy keyboards.
To prevent these agrevating symptoms he needs to have a parental figure within 10 meters of him at all times, and making him play at night has proven him to calm down.
His haircut (a buzzcut) has granted him access to engage in conversations with monkeys such as chimpanzees, orangutangs and the infamous Herr Nillson.
We suspect that he was raised by monkeys in his youth, which causes this abnormal behaviour.
Last but not least, his monkey based raising causes him to grow hair like a true chimp. He startet the rumors of bigfoot when he was skating and trying to do a macaroni tripple mcflurry flip with a backslick.
Melvin is the first neandertal reborn in modern time, this is made possible through his love for Billys pan pizza, which reincarnated him in 2008.
He has a total of 2 braincells that are both fighting for third place. Both his chromosones and height in centimeters are 176.
His name was declared in 2009 as another word for autism.
Melvin has a history of anger issues related to the popular game For Honor. Symptoms of Melvin being close to the game can cause him to scream racial slurs, brutally molest his microphone and destroy keyboards.
To prevent these agrevating symptoms he needs to have a parental figure within 10 meters of him at all times, and making him play at night has proven him to calm down.
His haircut (a buzzcut) has granted him access to engage in conversations with monkeys such as chimpanzees, orangutangs and the infamous Herr Nillson.
We suspect that he was raised by monkeys in his youth, which causes this abnormal behaviour.
Last but not least, his monkey based raising causes him to grow hair like a true chimp. He startet the rumors of bigfoot when he was skating and trying to do a macaroni tripple mcflurry flip with a backslick.
Person 1: Is he aucustic?
Person 2: Yes hes a bit on the Melvin side of the spectrum.
Patient: Give it to me straight doc, how did my autism test go?
Doctor: Im afraid that you tested 100% positive for Melvin'tism.
Patient: Dag nab it
Melvin: I passed the test. It told me that im artistic.
Doctor: No it said that you are autistic, is your name Melvin my any chance?
Person 1: Is that a monkey?
Person 2: No I think thats Melvin?
Melvin: Ooga Booga
Person 2: Yes hes a bit on the Melvin side of the spectrum.
Patient: Give it to me straight doc, how did my autism test go?
Doctor: Im afraid that you tested 100% positive for Melvin'tism.
Patient: Dag nab it
Melvin: I passed the test. It told me that im artistic.
Doctor: No it said that you are autistic, is your name Melvin my any chance?
Person 1: Is that a monkey?
Person 2: No I think thats Melvin?
Melvin: Ooga Booga
by Xi Ping January 22, 2024

by XD ETHEN SUCKS November 17, 2017

A front wedgie for a female.
by Wouldscrew October 3, 2022

by Melvin276473&2 March 26, 2024

Nefarious dude who has no trouble getting women and can put up a more than fair fight he will break your neck if you get close and will always protect his honor
by xGremlxn November 20, 2023

The chaddest chad of them all, even more chad than Coen. his lightskin stare is enough to blind anyone who sees it. people around Melvin are instantly cooler due to his captivating lightskin abilities. he is the alpha of the friend group and doesn't take shit from anyone, especially Sawyer. his rizz is so powerful, you simply cannot describe it.
Melvin: "i'm Melvin"
by ballermelvi December 5, 2022

by anonymous December 20, 2020
