Skip to main content

Hardy Defense

The Hardy defense is an argumentative tactic, analogous to the "Chewbacca Defense" (made famous by the late Johnie Cochran, in a South Park episode). The Chewbacca Defense itself, is a satirical term for any legal strategy that seeks to overwhelm its audience with nonsensical arguments and thus confuse them into failing to take account of the opposing arguments and, ultimately, to reject them.

It is thus, a kind of logical fallacy, specifically a red herring fallacy, and non sequitur similar to argumentum ad nauseam. The Hardy defense not only supercedes the Chewbacca defense in every regard, it is also not limited to the legal arena. Any argument, from the most profound, to the most mundane, will fall prey to the Hardy Defense.

The origin of the Hardy defense is the cesspool that is #efnet.org where I had made a comment about what is probably the most notable real-life ugly duckling story. I had made what I thought was a fairly innocent comment of, "Kurt Nilsen is cool." Little did I know, that I was about to face the most awe-inspiring and dramatic chownage known to any IRCer.

(For those that are unfamiliar with Kurt Nilsen, he was the most unlikely winner of the Norweigan idol competition, and even MORE unlikely winner of the World Idol title. He was voted as such almost unanimously at that. To say the least, it is by far one of the best underdog stories I've ever witnessed personally.)

I was then posed with a question by Hardy, "Why is he cool?" Before I was even given a chance to qualify my statement, I was faced with the barrage of verbal carnage that we have now come to know as The Hardy Defense. "I have admin flags in 3 EFnet regions, does that make me cool?" (*Note: The quotes aren't direct quotes, and have been paraphrased for effect. Please contact me for actual logs of the conversation.)

I was completely and utterly dumbfounded. My fingers experienced momentary atrophe and my fingertips even went cold. It was a few moments before I regained my composure to where I responded, with a noteworthy performance of my own, but we will save that for another day, and another /alias. Till then we must be shocked and awed with the immortalized Hardy Defense.
--- piggy @ EFnet
Any situation which requires a cheap and meaningless retort can be answered with The Hardy Defense
Eg:
'Why the fuck won't Firefox install?'
'Because Hardy has an admin flag in 3 regions'
by Avleen January 15, 2006
mugGet the Hardy Defense mug.

chewbacca defense

A straw man argument featured on the popular series South Park.
My client was found with blood all over his clothes and a gun in his hand, but because Kelogg's the breakfast of champions, you must find him not guilty.
by Exitium March 29, 2005
mugGet the chewbacca defense mug.

Ultimate Defense Mode

When a dog flips over on its back for no apparent reason and flails randomly. It happens.
Don't mess with my dog too much or he will go into Ultimate Defense Mode.
by Chalkey May 6, 2011
mugGet the Ultimate Defense Mode mug.

mouthwash defense

Used by probationers who aren't allowed to drink alcohol to explain why they fail breathalyzers. Similar to the toothpaste defense, the cough syrup defense, and the hand-sanitizer defense, the latter of which only applies to ETG tests (Urine alcohol tests).
Probation officer: You failed your breathalyzer.

Probationer: I didn't drink alcohol, I just used mouthwash before I came here.

Probation Officer: That's the mouthwash defense. It's bullshit and you know it. You're going to jail.
by Lupara2012 August 1, 2012
mugGet the mouthwash defense mug.

Sheridan Defense

When you piss off all the bad guys so they'll kill each other fighting over who gets to kill you. Named after Commander John Sheridan of Babylon 5. Also known as the Dresden Defense, after Harry Dresden.
You're in debt to the Crips AND the Bloods? Holy shit dude, way to use the Sheridan Defense.

Babylon 5 Dresden Files Brass Balls
by Haplo781 November 19, 2013
mugGet the Sheridan Defense mug.

disney defense

To follow ones heart no matter what anyone else tells you.
Jon skipped out on rehab with the Disney defense.
by LordShahagan November 26, 2014
mugGet the disney defense mug.

Pre-Defense

the feeling of preparing yourself for a discussion or an argument. You make sure that every fact, opinion or point that you want to make gets across exactly how you would want it to if you were actually saying it to someone in person. It makes you feel as if you "won" the argument or got your point across successfully because you actually thought it out, when in reality all you did was go over what you said to yourself in the shower, in the mirror, or even to your mom. Most people get this feeling when they know or feel as though they are about to get into an argument or if they feel heavily about a topic they already know what they want to say. Usually when it gets to the argument or the discussion most people forget what they "planned" to say and just start speaking without thinking about what they already thought about.
My roommate had a pre-defense to her and her boyfriend's argument.
by Ccrobin August 30, 2018
mugGet the Pre-Defense mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email