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My religion's not like the others

The bu**s**t statement that pushy/self-righteous Bible-thumpers --- no matter what denomination --- hastily tell you in an attempt to reassuringly counter your protest of, "No thanks --- I've never had any luck with religion or churches; everyone there is always arrogant and hypocritical to me, and expects too much of me." Uh-huh... **sure** they are --- believe that, and they'll tell ya another one --- plus they've probably also got some swampland in Florida to sell you. :P
Disgusted teenager: I had a recently "converted" zealot from a local religious group tell me that, "Oh, you'll love us, trust me --- my religion's not like the others that you've had negative experiences with! OUR God is the True God, and He will treat you much better!" Yeah, right --- and the KKK claims to actually a virtuous people-respecting organization as a whole --- "it was just a few radical extremist splinter-groups that were violent, and gave the whole organization a bad name"! It's what they ALL say... just about EVERY group or organization enthusiastically claims to be "different" and "much better than the others", when in reality most of them are just about the same in terms of how they treat you or how they behave.
by QuacksO September 18, 2018
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Measuring my big toe

t is a secretive way of saying masturbating aka. fapping, beating the meat, fapulishus.
It is comonly used by a group of men when a rare female is present, to not scare the rear specimen away.
Even though it might be little weird or suspicious it is clearly more safe and unnoticeable way of allerting your fellow dudes to not disturb or help you cover up.
When you use it in a sentence you will most likely bend it, in the usage they only bend the "measuring"; i measured, we are measuring, they measured, i am going to measure.
"Ey bro i gotta go and measure my big toe, be right back."
"Keep Stacy entertained i have to measuring my big toe."
"Ey Jackson i just spotted Ben and Charles, looks like they are measuring their big toes"
by CleverViking March 3, 2017
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A figure of speech to signify how someone feels when they're nervous, anxious, worried, afraid, ashamed, or even shy.
This is typically an unpleasant feeling, because you will see something that hurts you, worries you, or scares you.
I am feeling the heat go up my body whenever I see a picture of that girl, because I miss her terribly, but I know at the same time that she doesn't want me, so I will never get the chance to be with her.
by Lueriva Fetheroviu June 26, 2023
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EAT MY INSIDES

When female gets too excited during intercourse
*Inserts a stick*
(Female)EAT MY INSIDES!!
(Male)CALM THE FXCK DOWN!
by mkjdncmdjmcjdm April 22, 2021
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smh in my head

speaking of throwing tantrums over random bs
smh in my head
by MK2323 November 12, 2023
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a resemblance of a person not wanting you to his/her birthday party. being mean or disrespectful to a person may cause this to happen.
person 1: you suck!
person 2: im not inviting you to my birthday party
by webinterprise November 5, 2020
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Not My Noodles

Well, that's your problem. Not my noodles...
by threeleggedcentaur April 22, 2023
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