mashed sammich

A mashed sammich is when you take a piece of bread and smash it in your hand to eat like a sandwich. Nothing on it, just bread.

Boy: Grandpa I'm hungry

Grandpa: *smashes a piece of bread* There ya go, mashed sammich.

by ShitDemonFromDogma June 24, 2024

Broke it with a sammich

(1)A term used to allay blame onto another person, usually for or with no good reason.

(2)To do something impossible/highly unlikely.

(1)
Mother: How did my vase get broken?!?
Son1,2: Dunno chief!
Mother: Well someone better 'fess up before I open up a can o' whoop-ass.
Son 1: Alright! Son 2 broke it with a sammich!

(2)
Guy 1: *quintuple backflips off a building on rollerskates*
Guy 2: Dude! You just broke that trick with a sammich!

by Captainemo April 27, 2013

East-Side Sammich decoy

The act of stretching your ballsac , smearing hummus on your nipples, and falling asleep in the living room floor watching reruns of 'punky Brewster and ALF'.

The wind direction is perfect for a day at the mall for a mutuel East-side Sammich decoy.

by 2-cold, 2-care:aboutmyhair June 8, 2016

Beef curtain sammich

Amie’s step sister’s stretched out, wrecked, collapsed, baseball bat storage compartment.

Have you seen Amie’s beef curtain sammich?

by Friend of a fiend January 14, 2019

soup and sammich

When you’re droppin a deuce and a firm turd is followed by diarrhea.

“Sorry I’m late. I was in bathroom making a soup and sammich”

by Bill S Preston Esq October 6, 2022

Ohio Cream Cheese Sammich

When an obese woman’s fupa rubs against her legs, and the friction makes cream cream cheese, and then the man puts it between 2 crackers and makes her eat it.

How did that nasty woman get pregnant? She ate plenty of Ohio Cream Cheese Sammich’s.

by Things wrong about Ohio October 29, 2023

Ohio Cream Cheese Sammich

When an obese woman’s fupa rubs against her legs, and the friction makes cream cream cheese, and then the man puts it between 2 crackers and makes her eat it.

How did that nasty woman get pregnant? She ate plenty of Ohio Cream Cheese Sammich’s.

by Things wrong about Ohio October 29, 2023