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Professional Battle Rattle

Variant of the term Battle Rattle. In this case it means wearing a suit and tie. This phrase is likely used by veterans who try to avoid wearing suits but are in a profession that requires wearing a suit.
Because we are meeting with the CEO of the company, we need everyone in professional battle rattle for the meeting. No Jeans, or T-Shirts with funny pictures folks.
by cw42 October 13, 2019
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Professional Ass Bum

A person who is overqualified to be just a literal bum, they are exceptionally skilled in the art of their trade.

Their lively-hood consist of a very strategic master manipulation ploy to go above and beyond all acts of the call of duty BUMISM!

To be considered a professional ass bum you must NEVER be able to keep a job past a 2-4 week time period. Always, find a way to not keep a job...EXCUSES!

You must always appear to look like you are indeed not a bum.

You must be an expert in doing ABSOLUTELY nothing, yet appear to be EVERYTHING.

To become a master in Professional Ass Bumism... you sabotage everything around you that does NOT benefit you.

Only a Professional Ass Bum has the ability to make a career out of this lifestyle.
"There is only one answer to explain Omar, he has got to be a PROFESSIONAL ASS BUM!?"
by ThaRealZaddddy12 November 7, 2019
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Professional Hand Clown

A sarcastic way of saying someone is a comedy writer; these types of people are always joking around.
There’s at least one professional hand clown at CNN watch for yourself.
by SwingingDick69 May 15, 2022
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professional armchair pilot

A professional armchair pilot is a person who is obsessed with aviation and aircraft, but has no actual pilot training or experience. They may spend hours studying flight manuals, watching aviation videos, and discussing the finer points of aircraft performance, yet they have never even set foot in the cockpit of an actual plane. Despite their lack of practical knowledge, these individuals may still consider themselves experts on all things aviation and may even offer their unsolicited opinions on piloting techniques and aircraft design.
"I asked John for his advice on flying my small aircraft, but it turns out he's just a professional armchair pilot who's never even been in a cockpit. I think I'll go with the advice of the actual pilot I know."
by ILoveRyan69420 January 6, 2023
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Professional Victim

One who feigns helplessness to garner support, sympathy or attention, usually the "I'm so helpless" female trope,
but if you call them on it, will then attempt to turn it back on you, saying "YOU'RE the problem."
1: How's your relationship with Meg going?
2: Yeah... Called her out on not texting me back for a week... She said I shouldn't "pressure her" and "Her life was hard" and "I should understand"
1: HOLY SHIT... She went "Professional Victim"?
2: Yep... TOTALLY.
by Conscious Thinker February 26, 2023
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Professional Pocket Watcher

A person who is obsessed with and spends the majority of their life knowing more about what's inside someone's elses pockets more than what's in their own pockets or own life. Usually a hater, they make rampant HR violations at work by talking about everyone else's take home salary openly in the office. They are so busy watching others they have no value in their own career, job, or life as all their time is spent watching others instead of actually developing their own skills and abilities, thus making them easily replaceable.
Man did you see Erik at work today? He's a true professional Pocket Watcher and should take part in the World Olympics Pocket Watching division. I am sure he would win.

Though Edward hated pocket watchers growing up in the south, he become a Professional Pocket Watcher himself over the years when he knew how much money all his neighbors paid for rent , how much was in their bank account, when their checks hit every month, and how long they've lived at the building.
by GO DJ HaKa July 7, 2023
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Cupcake Professional

A person who is wildly incompetent at their job but tries to make up for it by acting/dressing cute
Shawna really just does nothing all day, why does she have a job here ?

She is a cupcake professional , you cant fire anyone that adoreable.
by Come on meow November 23, 2014
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