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captain obvious

Often used to refer to someone who ruins a joke by stating the obvious
Mostly used in comment sections of social media platforms
Hey look mom, it's captain obvious!
Oh no, captain obvious on the wheel again!
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Captain Warpspeed

45th president of the United States and WEF stooge, Donald Trump. Named so due to Operation Warpspeed.
"WAKAWOOGA MAGAMOOGA TRUST THE PLAN! DVRK MVGV TRVMP!"
"You're still on the TrumpTrain after Captain Warpspeed has done jackshit to help Julian Assange?"
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Armchair captain

Someone who has 10,000 hours practice flying an armchair at a maximum flight ceiling of 0 feet above the ground, and who feels like they must never be distracted from their glorious mission of defending their front room. See also: lazy git
I have just been qualified as an armchair captain, but I can no longer feel my arse cheeks
by Armchair captain 1 June 26, 2024
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captain carrot

Someone who likes to belittle others because he has a small penis and doesn't want anyone to know just how horribly small he is!
Captain Carrot thinks he is all that but has to use a microscope and tweezers to find his ding aling!
by protective mama July 11, 2024
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Captain Long

Certified helicopter operator. On side he tends to take dick slinging very seriously with snapbots.
Captain longs leaks had him dick slinging on camera.
by Allie- Snapbot March 31, 2025
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Captain Long

Certified helicopter operator. On side he tends to take dick slinging very seriously with snapbots.
Captain longs leaks had him dick slinging on camera.
by Allie- Snapbot March 31, 2025
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Captain Long

Certified helicopter operator. On side he tends to take dick slinging very seriously with snapchat bots.
Captain longs leaks had him dick slinging on camera.
by Allie- Snapbot March 31, 2025
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