Turtle Monkey

A man that has a long neck, a hairy body and a monkey face.

Guy 1- see this guy right there?

Guy 2- He looks like a turtle monkey.

by Defineiswhatido January 26, 2021

Turtle poaching

When you punch someone who has a small penis in the dick making there head shrivel like a turtle.

Payton: i got turtle poached by some guy yesterday
thomas: omg is yo dick okay i hate turtle poaching

by Arnold mcjagger May 31, 2013

Laundry turtle

Noun. When you fill a laundry basket way over the top, then drape a towel over the pile and tuck it into the sides of the basket so nothing will fall out while carrying. The result resembles a turtle shell, and sometimes it will have little 'legs' of laundry items sticking out of holes in the basket.

I waited too long to do laundry, now im definitely gonna have to make a laundry turtle

by ¡El Fantazzzzma Blancoooooooo! July 23, 2024

Snapping turtle

Sex position, involves having sex with only the protruding head of a turtle (usually of the snapping variety). Bonus points if the shell vibrates.

Abby: Dude why are you bleeding like that

Kate: I tried the snapping turtle at the lake and it didn’t go well

by Lakelesbos69 August 31, 2021

Snapping Turtle

A clamp or clip tightened around the testicles.

Mike: No way! John has a Snapping Turtle!
John: What the fuck is that?

by RuggerBuggerBuggyBumpers August 31, 2023

turtle choker

A plastic straw

Her: Ugh... you're using a turtle choker?!
Me: Yeah, thot

by Tree Mugger November 17, 2019

punch the turtle

To attempt something that does have a small chance of success - but will likely end in failure and pain.

Did you hear how Josh and Christel are trying to create new slang? They're trying to punch the turtle with that...

by JBonesMcGee March 30, 2019