Parent Text

When a Mother/Father/parental guidan is upset with you, and sends a essay instead of a text.

Person "I forgot to do the dishes before I left, and now I got a parent Text from my mom".

by i_love_fancy_bread September 12, 2022

funnel text

Simulatiously texting a large number of women to whittle down the responses with the end goal of having selfish one-sided sex with a responder.

I was funnel texting last night....got 5 responders and ended up shagging Jessie again.

by Famous Reekie January 1, 2017

Text Blogging

The act of sending unsolicited texts that are not answering a question, making a request, have an obvious response, any response would seem pointless, or are otherwise considered pointless by the recipient. These are texts that serve no two-way-communication-purpose and seem to be just informing you of something that requires no further action or response.

Texter 1: I'm eating breakfast.
Texter 2: man, quit text blogging me
Texter 1: I just wanted to say I'm eating breakfast.
Texter 2: Good for you.

by catsgotmytongue October 13, 2011

Vestigal Text

A text message wherein the original thread is seriously out of date

Tom - Did you read my new test?
Emmett - Yes but it included that fucking vestigal text thread that you sent me 6 months ago and I got confused

by Salinasone November 18, 2021

text ninja

n. name given to anyone who had the ability of texting long coherent messages on their phone without looking. this was usually done back when phones had button keyboards and where not touch screen.

Chelsea can hold a conversation with you and simultaneously text behind her back. The ultimate text ninja.

The art of the text ninja has disappeared over the years.

Becoming a text ninja requires patience and the memorization of the "qwerty" style keyboard.

by Sloth Slayer October 23, 2016

Stages of Texting

The formality of your messages, mainly texting for how a person may judge your internet/online status. The different stages include usage of capital letters, punctuation, and emojis.

Stages of Texting
Stage 1 (informal): OMG THAT WAS SOOOOOOOOOO FUNNY *insert crying laughing emoji here*
Stage 2 (casual): Yeah the party's on Thursday
Stage 3 (normal): I'm pretty sure she's upset about her boyfriend dumping her.
Stage 4 (ass eater): Laughing out loud, that was quite the funny joke x capital d laughing my ass off.

by Chinis Chink December 3, 2016

Grandma Text

Means when u text or respond to a text too slow , like grandma would knowing she doesn't know what to do with a text mechanism phone.

Whitney: Everytime i text shannon, she always reponds two hours from then !*frowning n frustrated*

Brandi: girl u know she is a grandma texter, she slow as hell!! lol

by Blackcat89 May 20, 2011