Egg on my face

When you are embarrassed by your ex girlfriend for leaving a snail trail of other dudes semen behind her everywhere she walks, so you decide to crack a few eggs over your head and let the goo slowly run down your face so you can feel like a cumshot whore without the risk of ruining your self esteem.

Random man: “Jesus Christ man, tell your lady to grab a f**king mop! I almost slipped on her snail trail.”

Nik: “Omg brother I’m so embarrassed (pulled 2 eggs from his pocket and cracks them over his head) now I have egg on my face.”

by DarkCoffee January 12, 2025

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Get the Egg on my facemug.

Fluid in my face

All up in the the right half of my cranium I can hear a popping sound when I swallow or the pressure in my head changes.

Hym "That is why I'm not doing any of your self improvement bullshit- What did I mix up Matt brown with Mike Perry? Yeah, no, Matt brown doesn't beat up old people... But that's besides the point. There is fluid in my face and/or brainz. I don't need fucking self-improvement. I don't need to think more-gooders about fucking women OR RETARDS. I need MY FUCKING MONEY for LITERALLY CREATING A.I., you fucks. I could have had a fucking stroke 10 times over by now. And I know that's what you stupid cocksuckers are thinking over there. 'He needs to think more-gooders about women DERRRR He needs to do a fucking self-help DERRR He needs a Jesus' NO! Wrong! I need the money and the free time that comes with being the literal creator of A.I. That's what I need. Nothing else matters"

by Hym Iam August 14, 2024

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