Mikalah: I swear i have a secret uncle.
Madi: I don’t believe you, show me.
mikalah: I can’t it’s a secret!
Madi: I don’t believe you, show me.
mikalah: I can’t it’s a secret!
by Jeeoh July 26, 2021
Get the secret unclemug. A badass uncle who doesn't a shit about what others think! He's always welcoming and hospitable. On friday nights especially, he'll invite you to his house (which he cutely calls his lair) for fifa. Once you enter, you'll begin to notice, there is no TV. As a matter face, there is no furniture. Cum stains litter the walls.
"Wait what!" you'll scream,
"Cmon you know you love it" he'll respond.
He then shoves you into its scrotum where it smells like fish and the flesh hugs you from all sides.
Defined by his parents, Uncle Precious is a family sweetheart. When he was younger though, he went a horny rebellious teen phase. They would be eating dinner, when the whole house would begin to smell like fish. Yet the scent would grow stronger and stronger. Uncle Precious would come closer and closer. Hornier and hornier.
"What the shit Precious! It smells like fish!"
"Cmon you know you love it!" he would respond
"HE LOOKS HORNY!!!" My mother would cry, noting the massive bump in his pants.
"On the count of 3, 1... 2... RUN!!!" My grandmother shout.
Uncle precious would then run around the house terrifying the family members while stroking his member, his dick wagging in front of him like a happy dog.
Then, something snapped inside my grandfather. He pulled out the 16mm thumbtack from his front pocket. And pinned his scrotum to all corners of the house. He never misbehaved, ever again. Until, his sister had children.
"Wait what!" you'll scream,
"Cmon you know you love it" he'll respond.
He then shoves you into its scrotum where it smells like fish and the flesh hugs you from all sides.
Defined by his parents, Uncle Precious is a family sweetheart. When he was younger though, he went a horny rebellious teen phase. They would be eating dinner, when the whole house would begin to smell like fish. Yet the scent would grow stronger and stronger. Uncle Precious would come closer and closer. Hornier and hornier.
"What the shit Precious! It smells like fish!"
"Cmon you know you love it!" he would respond
"HE LOOKS HORNY!!!" My mother would cry, noting the massive bump in his pants.
"On the count of 3, 1... 2... RUN!!!" My grandmother shout.
Uncle precious would then run around the house terrifying the family members while stroking his member, his dick wagging in front of him like a happy dog.
Then, something snapped inside my grandfather. He pulled out the 16mm thumbtack from his front pocket. And pinned his scrotum to all corners of the house. He never misbehaved, ever again. Until, his sister had children.
"Please be gentle this time Uncle Precious, last time your rough scrotum really hurt me!"
"Cmon Uncle, do I really have to take Viagra the third time this day, I'm already bricked as hell!"
"UNCLE PRECIOUS: I'M GOING SOFT,!!!! I NEED MY VIAGRA!!!! I CANT BE SOFT EVER AGAIN!!!!!"
"Cmon Uncle, do I really have to take Viagra the third time this day, I'm already bricked as hell!"
"UNCLE PRECIOUS: I'M GOING SOFT,!!!! I NEED MY VIAGRA!!!! I CANT BE SOFT EVER AGAIN!!!!!"
by UnclePrecious December 27, 2023
Get the Uncle Preciousmug. by SuperNigger2145 October 2, 2024
Get the Uncle Samsonitemug. the performance of felatio on a flaccid penis through the time it become erect and until completion.
Troy: Hilary woke me up to the an uncle noodle!
David: So I guess you can say you started your day off on the right foot.
Troy: dude shut your corny ass up
David: So I guess you can say you started your day off on the right foot.
Troy: dude shut your corny ass up
by RanchOnEverythang July 8, 2016
Get the uncle noodlemug. Person 1: "Whos tightened that up? "
Person 2: "Garth's uncle!"
Or
When tigheting something:
Person "Garth it!"
Person 2: "Garth's uncle!"
Or
When tigheting something:
Person "Garth it!"
by Mr.Lamb22 February 26, 2024
Get the Garth's Unclemug. 
Daniel: Your mom gay lol.
Me: Don't make me do it..
Tabby: Your dad lesbian.
Me: I swear..
Ash: Your granny tranny
Me: NIBBA YOUR UNCLE MIKE A DYKE
*world implodes*
Me: Don't make me do it..
Tabby: Your dad lesbian.
Me: I swear..
Ash: Your granny tranny
Me: NIBBA YOUR UNCLE MIKE A DYKE
*world implodes*
by iced.milk May 11, 2018
Get the Your Uncle Mike a Dykemug.