ham slapper

a person who loves to have fun, often with friends and family

"i am a ham slapper, and i'm here to say:
that i love to have fun every day"

by fun haver August 30, 2015

Vagina ham

The worst type of female genital abuse when you get abducted and wake one day with"vagina ham," i.e. a thick newer inner labia that resembles a fucked up drawn flower, covered vagina grooves that then moreso resemble "apple pie" consistency, and a donut-esque squishy covering where your cervix is located.

Probably done by someone trying to trap you in a place to drug you because you're a threat to them and they can't exist without using and exploiting vagina.

I stayed with my creep as dad for a few months and got vagina ham.

That dude literally got so threatened by me and a mental prowess that he gave me vagina ham.

My family was afraid that I'm gay, and I am... but I got vagina hammed before I could come out.

Some horrible abduction happened to me and now I'm vagina hammed.

I got trapped at my parents' house after moving back and then got vagina hammed, then I got drugged and abused for years.

by h84cvltlyfe February 17, 2022

Morbius ham

The sexual act of which a woman lights her partners penis on fire before he penetrates her vagina

Eh bro I had MORBIUS HAM with your mother yesterday

by Quantavious bingleton June 10, 2022

Ham For Breakfast

The act of being woken up by a person's bare ass on your face. Usually in the context of a college prank.

Duude, Robbie totally gave you ham for breakfast! That is disgusting!

by MissingRab May 5, 2011

Abra-Ham Lincoln Log

A guy that really likes ham and Lincoln logs. He was a president, for some reason. He might have gone to a play to show the biggest Lincoln log tower and it not falling over, and putting ham sandwiches between each piece and eating the ham sandwiches without it falling over. Then, John Walks Booth said that Lincoln didn't go through the walking booth. So John Walks Booth assassinated him, making the tower fall.

Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: AND TODAY I WILL EAT THESE HAM SANDWICHES!!!
John Walks Booth: Wait a minute! You didn't get a Walking Ticket from the Walking Booth!
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: I-I don't need one if I'm on stag-
John Walks Booth: I don't wanna hear it! "pulls out his glock"
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: WAIT WAIT WAIT, NO WE CAN WORK THIS OUT!! I'LL GET A TICKE-"Gets shot"
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log after dead: Damn It, I was gonna get the world record for most sandwiches eaten between Lincoln logs.

by AStrunkMan69 July 4, 2022

Portable Ham

The best thing ever. Period. Only cool people like that show.

Only the most blessed of people can find it living deep within the murky bowels of that which is 'the world wide wizzeb'.

See; The best fucking thing ever.

'Oh my god there's a new Portable Ham out. I can't beleive his dad died of Cholera!'

'Yeah...and then his mom...dyed of the plague.'

'What the fuck? You poser.'

by Crackotage September 26, 2006

bant ham

1. A ham that has rotted so badly that even flies cannot eat it. Maggots inside will die, and it has to be burned to get rid of it.

2. A person who has not showered in weeks.

Damn, Jimmy smells as bad as a bant ham.

by rubikscubeguy March 7, 2019