a simp ditches the boys for the e girls like on siege
jason you simp dogging us for arctic again wtf bro
by hail Llyam123 March 10, 2020
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He is a pretty weird guy, but in a hilarious way. Extremely obsessed with this one girl with freckles and black hair that is most likely aware that he likes her and she gave him multiple chances probably intentionally to talk to her but he is too much of a fucking dumb ass and a pussy to actually fucking do anything. He has an extreme freckle fetish and has curly hair, thereby promising he isn't a rapist with the candy in the red van and slide doors. He finally said hi to that girl with freckles he has liked for 2 years now and she said hi back, again he was too much of a dumb ass to actually try to have a conversation with her.
Nicole: Whatda fuck, i gave him so many clear shots

to talk to me and so many fucking hints, and all
he says is hi! He is such a fucking dumb ass.
_________________________________________
Jason: But she has freckles... *cries*
by Weallfun September 19, 2019
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anyone with the name jason is known as the biggest ass in the building. He is usually an incompetent bastard who is not capable of doing standard every-day things. He weasels his way out of any chore or action that helps anyone else. He tends to be a poser and pretends to know things just to look like a man. He thinks treating women horribly in front of men makes him look manly. He doesnt bother hiding his napoleon complex because he doesn't realize that everyone knows he is trying to over copensate for the youth size protective cup that he owns.
"That mama's boy can't even take care of himself, he's such a jason."

"Did he just say that Reggie Bush got a homerun?, what a Jason!"
by itisthemostfactualpieceofinfo December 23, 2011
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Wow I can't believe I sucked a Jason without knowing what I got into.....
by albondigas_locas March 6, 2016
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A douche who looks very similar to a Neanderthal. You can identify a Jason by his prominent brow bone and distinctive poof on his chin that he likes to call a chin-beard. In reality, this is mold that is growing upon his visage. His singing can be likened to toads mating. His breast size should be a solid b-cup which is accentuated best by his Lance Armstrong bike shirt. His bosom will cause some of the ladies to be jealous. He is short in both physical stature and schlong size. However, his ego makes up for this. Everyone should know that his IQ is at least 260, and that is DEFINITELY not an exaggeration. If he breaks up with anyone it is certainly a good idea, for his IQ told him so.
Girl 1: damn, I wish my boobs were as big as Jason's,

Girl 2: Yeah, I know, right? Me too. I'm only an A-cup...

Man in the forest: What's that sound. Is that a toad. Oh wait. Jason has begun a ballad...
by My guitar March 5, 2012
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While he can sometimes be a whiney bitch, we forgive him because he also has a nice spine. Damn. He has an expansive buttplug collection and enjoys long walks on the beach. Usually alone. When he is not walking on the beach or trying out a new buttplug, Jason can be found trying to find the meaning of life... and failing horribly. Life is pain.
Damn Jason has fine spine!
by CterSinner6969 December 31, 2016
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