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cunt satchel

A person who is such an extreme cunt that they hold multiple cunts within their person. Like a satchel.
'Yesterday Todd and a bunch of his follower friends were here making fun of and harassing the kids who live across the street. Todd is such a cunt satchel.'
by Dizzzavid February 13, 2015
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magic satchel

A concept similar to hammerspace, though hammerspace is specific to cartoons. In a game, when an inventory item is stored seemingly nowhere, it is said to be put in a "magic satchel." A magic satchel can conform to any size, from a small pill to a large building.
"Dude, where the fuck did Master Chief just put his rocket launcher?"
"It's in his magic satchel, duh."
by Fresnel December 2, 2007
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Testes Satchel

A slightly more sophisticated way of referring to the scrotum (ball sack). Often used in a threat of being hit in the balls.
Ted: Man you really suck at Wii.

Ralphie: You better shut up, or I'll give you a good whap to the Testes Satchel!

Bob: Why are you clutching your pants like that?

Bill: My Testes Satchel is still sore from being sacked yesterday.
by Larry Finster December 27, 2009
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Satchel Ass

1. A man with an ass wider than his shoulders (or the ass of said man); such people are satchel asses and are not to be trusted.
You're a satchel ass, Mick Foley. Satchel Ass! SATCHEL ASS!!!
by ScottBoulder August 22, 2010
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rape satchel

To rape someone so hard in a type of competitive environment, there are only partial bodily remains left. These remains are then stored in a satchel to confirm the severity of the rapeage.
Dude! I totally laid the rape satchel on you in that last round of Black Ops!
by -Samax- December 16, 2010
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Cum satchel

When you use a vacuum cleaner to masturbate and use a shamwow to clean up the mess and put it in your satchel and bring it to the sperm bank to sell for a minimum of $69 and a maximum of $6969
"Dude I just got 69 dollars with my cum satchel method ways!"
by Cum sack June 14, 2013
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rat satchel

To hide or conceal drug paraphernalia in your scrotum. First by removing your testicles to create a pouch.
When Fred went to prison he hid his stash in his rat satchel.
by Dennis Leppala October 1, 2007
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