Pyro-noxious Slabs

A hazardous, geologic event wherein a hyper-accelerating flow of highly concentrated, sulfur infused volcanic magma builds, cools and intermittently cracks, avulsing into jaggedly uniform, mobilzed 'slabs' of densely toxic rock formations. In rare and unique environmental conditions, migratory slabs have been observed to spontaneously combust into abounding flames upon impact with proximate flora, fauna and curious homosapien onlookers, resulting in a enveloping expulsion of sulfuric cinder chards and respiratory impairing, noxious fumes.

1. "Did you see how the lava formed into 'Pyro-noxious Slabs' when it came down the side of of the volcano, cooling in rhythmic waves as it hit the ocean water's edge?"

2. "I still can't believe that Drew was instantaneously incinerated into a sulfuric plume of ash when that 'Pyro-noxious Slab' chased after him while he was trying to take pictures!"

by Charitable Disguise December 3, 2019

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Get the Pyro-noxious Slabsmug.

app-noxious

iPhones and other smartphones are now capable of all kinds of amazing feats. But while our technology has developed by leaps and bounds, human nature — specifically our tendency to become obsessed with shiny new toys — hasn’t changed a whit.

Person 1: "Wow dude, I just searched that China has over 3 billion people"

Person 2: "You are so app-noxious, bro ..."

by Steven Glossy May 13, 2009

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