Jacob's Dad

A sad, lonely beta male who's existence is only told in legends. No one knows where or who he is, and no one ever will.

Guy 1: Hey, who's that gross homeless man on the side?
Guy 2: It could be Jacob's Dad, taking a disguise to hide his true identity.

by negrotime! February 21, 2018

Dirty Jacob’s Dad

A sexual act where an attractive middle aged man who often enjoys cycling steals the dog bed and television from his son’s house and uses it to lure the dog back to his local gym. He then proceeds to dress up in tight pink Lycra and perform a handstand by the exercise bikes with butter rubbed along his huge dick so that the dog sucks him off while watching other hot men cycling on his stolen TV. This is usually accompanied by extremely loud screams from the man to attract as much attention to himself as possible as well as gleeful noises from the sucking dog when it’s fur is splattered with tasty white cum.

“What’s that screaming? Is there a dog in here?”

“Don’t worry, it’s just someone doing a Dirty Jacob’s Dad in the corner.”

by MantleLikesKids November 6, 2022

Jacob's Third Law

Men are always right, Women are always wrong.

Exeption: When (most) men agree with the woman, in which case the woman is right.
Otherwise a paradox would be created in which neither man or woman are right.

Felice says Thomas is yellow, Thomas says he's not. Male friends agree with Felice


According to Jacob's Third Law Felice and her male friends are right. Thomas is yellow.

by Elizabeth171 April 11, 2009

Jacob's plow

When having sex with a girl (or guy) doggy style, picking your partner up by the legs and shoving their face into the floor.

Karen was enjoying the sex until the unexpected Jacob's Plow at the end.

by Andrew C.H. February 10, 2007

Jacob's ass

The area between the driver and passenger seat.

Guy X: Where's the swisher?

Guy Y: It fell in there.

Guy X: Where?

Guy Y: You know--over there with the thing and stuff.

Guy X: Jacob's ass?

Guy Y: Jacob's ass!

Guy X: Jacob's ass! (retrieves the swisher)

by Gyppeh September 13, 2009

Jacob's Dad

A piece of shit no one likes.

"Jacob's Dad is an asshole"

by EINGO November 3, 2019

Jacob’s balls

Manky, wrinkly things that he likes to rub in everybody’s face and when they faint he has some yummy times with them as he infects them with blue waffles

Man I hate Jacob’s balls

by Animegirl69 July 18, 2020