Gammon

An old conservative Englishman who bickers on about minorities instead of helping solve the country's issues.

1 : Dad keeps complaining about the Syrian couple across the road
2: Just ignore him, he's a hateful old gammon
1: Yeah, you're right.

by Banana Banzai November 5, 2022

hanging gammon

hanging gammon. a noun <verb> to describe a low hanging cliterous.

look at her over there. her gammon is hanging low.

she Has hanging gammon and I don't mean in the kitchen

by Masterbains February 3, 2014

gammon hangers

Flapping female labia - see beef curtains

She had gammon hangers like a pork butcher on pension day

by Beefy February 9, 2004

gammon satchel

A gammon satchel is a salty vagina with two big salty flaps which stick together. Also known as a ready salted vagina

I can't believe you unbuckled her gammon satchel... thats nasty! People have been jailed for less.

by Tilly Tilly October 7, 2013

gammon slipper

Used to describe someone thick or frustratingly stupid. Based on the slang for a ladies downstairs area

Darren: "I sold my Datsun to this geezer who then crashed it and wanted his money back"

Tim: "urgh, what a complete Gammon Slipper"

by QuantumMan October 7, 2016

Gammonigook

Incoherent rant from a stout yeomen, probably because of high blood pressure caused by decades of 'PC gone mad', being defeated in arguments about the non-existent merits of Brexit and women getting the vote.

Gammon often make their appearance on BBC's Question Time jabbing their porcine fingers at the camera while demanding immediate nuclear strikes against Remain-voting areas, people who eat vegetables and/or cyclists.

The Gammonigook spouting from the Gammon was harsh upone the pub goers ears.

by Gammonhunter July 1, 2018

Average Gammon

Defined as being a women who one would copulate with if the chance arises.

•Average Gammon... Get out your salmon..?

•Callum: how'd your date go?

Oly: she was average gammon at best.

Callum: and did she get out her salmon?

Oly: Of course baba, eeaassyyy!

by McCooks June 13, 2014