Penis Reset

Getting your body reset from what it knew so it can move on.

Having sex with someone else for the first time after a breakup.

Giving you someone new and more recent to remember having sex with than your ex.

guy 1: I can't stand her.. but I haven't got laid is so long.. I can't stop thinking about her.
guy 2: Dude, you just need to find someone new and get a Penis Reset.

by buddhafish July 20, 2012

Flag

Get the Penis Reset mug.

pasta penis

When a male is unable to maintain an erection for the duration of sexual intercourse, It may start off hard, but undergoes a physical transformation similar to that of dry pasta boiling in water, ending up with the rigidness of a noodle.

John had too much whiskey on his date with Kathy and ended up with a case of pasta penis in bed.

by CyMatic December 17, 2011

Flag

Get the pasta penis mug.

Necro-penis

1. An appendage that is literally lethal. Will murder that pussy any given Sunday and therefore is illegal to concealed carry. Legally must rock out with your cock out.

2. A small town in south Florida where there is a lot of perceived incest and smoke signals. Population 964 and shrinking due do the fucking off. Never let them see your poker face in this town.

1.

Crass money maker: hey I’m sorry for your loss. How did your girlfriend kick the bucket?

Boss Hog: I have a necro-penis!!! Look it’s literally out because that’s the law!

Crass money maker: Oh shit dude there it is, out and about for everyone to see. For my pleasure. Your as hard I me right now too!

Crass money maker: you can’t fake the fuck buster, you can’t fake the fuck.

Boss hog: you are a sick fucking fuck motherfucker!

2.
Lit boss: hey crew I’m going on vacation to necro-penis this weekend. Don’t wait up.

Salty crew: don’t let ‘em see your poker face or your boner face.

Lit boss: THANKS FOR THE HEADS UP AND THE HEAD GUYS!

by Bro Jake March 24, 2023

Flag

Get the Necro-penis mug.

Horse Penis

The greatest thing to ever conjoin with my anus. It spread me like an eagle's wings and filled me like a jelly doughnut. When it entered my mouth, it slid down my throat like a slip n' slide and thrusted at the speed of sound. When the horse was done, I looked like a pregnant woman that ate expired mayonnaise. After a few minutes, I decided it was my turn. I angled it just right and pushed back and forth until my mayo filled the horse. Soon after, the horse pushed me down and fucked my asshole until it hit my colon. It was so deep I cried with joy. After the experience of a lifetime, I cried to the feeling of no horse penis. With 1,949 dollar, I bought a 208 foot horse penis dildo, opened the miracle, and went for the horse ride of a lifetime. It made my penis spring with joy and made me go for round two with the horse.

Michael Joseph Lee Gibson Loves Horse penis.

by HorseLover 69 December 2, 2022

Flag