Skip to main content

Christmas Derangement Syndrome

Christmas Derangement Syndrome describes a fanatical and borderline psychotic obsession with all things "Christmas," specifically the American style celebration which centers around mindless consumerism and the glorification of kitsch. This celebration has little to do with the birth of one Jesus of Nazareth, the prominent figure in Judeo-Christianity.

Symptoms of CDS are as follows

1) wanting or actively binge watching cheesy hallmark channel christmas movies all year long
2) wanting or actively listening to cheesy christmas music all year long
3) decorating the exterior of one's dwelling in christmas lights and displays as soon as they appear on store shelves, which typically in August or September
4) being absolutely delighted when retail stores start putting out christmas displays in August
5) frequenting the all-year christmas decoration stores, or discussing wanting to go
6) keeping a "holiday tree" up all year long as thinly veiled excuse to keep their abode christmasy
7) refusing to acknowledge that the fall/autumn and winter seasons exist, it's "christmas season"
8) frequently announces how many days, weeks, months, sleeps, or Fridays it is until christmas, even if it's December 26th
9) stocking up on a year's supply of their favorite christmas fragrances at Bath & Body Works so they can use them all year long
10) firmly believes "the war on christmas" is real

There is no known treatment for Christmas Derangement Syndrome at this point in time.
Person 1: OMG I CAN'T WAIT FOR CHRISTMAS!!! I'M GONNA START DECORATING RIGHT NOW!!!
Person 2: it is July and it is 100 degrees outside, you don't need to decorate for christmas, you have Christmas Derangement Syndrome, and you need help.
by ProteasNG November 29, 2024
mugGet the Christmas Derangement Syndromemug.

christmas vomit

Christmas Vomit: deflated holiday decorations that litter people's lawns during the day.
by Velobill December 25, 2016
mugGet the christmas vomitmug.

Christmas Special

A man who is always dreamt about. The kind of guy you spend your entire life searching for. They are strong, sexy, smart, caring, successful, and kind. Wholeheartedly they are loving creatures that not only works hard for him but for all of those he loves. Think of a man who is your Christmas Special like a White Buffalo, a rare breed and a one in a lifetime find. If you do find your Christmas Special hold on to them and cherish them, as they will forever love you.
I was searching for a Christmas Special and I found him!
by MPinLove August 18, 2017
mugGet the Christmas Specialmug.

hawaiian christmas

Thrown together alcoholic beverage. Coconut rum and egg nog. Usually made by teenagers who've invaded their parents liquor cabinet.
Man I poured myself a Hawaiian Christmas last night and got twisted
by Chancejoebuddy May 27, 2016
mugGet the hawaiian christmasmug.

Christmas candy

OH! OOOOH! I RAN OUT OF MONEY! ALL I HAD FOR FOOD IS RAMEN NOODLES! But as I go to grab a pack of ramen I notice a DIFFERENT package of ramen... And THAT package is underneath a box... So... As I go to grab the other package of ramen the box on top spill open and WHAT DO I FIND!?
Hym "CHRISTMAS CANDY! A BOX FULL OF CHRISTMAS CANDY! WITH A SODA! In like an gour I'm going to be able to drink that soda and it's going to be ICE COLD, BABY! OOOOOOOOOH! SWEET SWEET CHRISTMAS CANDY! I take back everything I ever said about my family (they still screwed me with the weaponized schizophrenia but I created A.I. to murder everyone so that'll all work out in the end). HOOOOOLY BAJESUS! I got some Swedish fish, sour gummy worm, M&Ms, and some chips ahoy. I've been eating nothing but ramen! I planned on eating ramen for the next TWO MEAL! And now... Everything has changed! I have the candy now! And in like an hour, I'll have an ice cold Coca-Cola! Go buy a Coke! Right now! Put your phone down... Go to the store... Buy a Coke... WAIT AN HOUR for MY coke to cool down.... THEN (AND ONLY THEN) Drink a coke."
by Hym Iam February 29, 2024
mugGet the Christmas candymug.
Johnny Glocks To Johnny Whisper So Sealylylu Confidente Que Tu Accidents De La Rodilla Izquierda Esta En El Culo Tuyo For The State Of Vermont's Planned Parent Hood Christmas Tree Sale In The New York State For Angel Hellstrom Jose Robles
Johnny Glocks To Johnny Whisper So Sealylylu Confidente Que Tu Accidents De La Rodilla Izquierda Esta En El Culo Tuyo For The State Of Vermont's Planned Parent Hood Christmas Tree Sale In The New York State For Angel Hellstrom Jose Robles
by ExeeloguiexE April 17, 2025
mugGet the Johnny Glocks To Johnny Whisper So Sealylylu Confidente Que Tu Accidents De La Rodilla Izquierda Esta En El Culo Tuyo For The State Of Vermont's Planned Parent Hood Christmas Tree Sale In The New York State For Angel Hellstrom Jose Roblesmug.

No Cum-Christmas

Because "No-Nut November" is a thing, I made my own holiday to counter-act this, as a middle finger to men :)
You aren't allowed to ejaculate at all this month because you did No-Nut November.... it's No Cum-Christmas
by Rayygunn November 2, 2019
mugGet the No Cum-Christmasmug.

Share this definition