You, me. Bed, now.

Telling the person you’re talking to that you want to get jiggy. Now.

Steve: Hey Chad, we gonna do something before I leave?
Chad: You, Me. Bed, Now.
Steve: Oh…

by JizzedInTheTeaKettle May 7, 2022

Bed Maid

Sometimes "Wet Maid". Not to be confused with "Wet Nurse".

A maid employed to assist with sexual activities in a supporting role for a couple. The important distinction being that the maid is never engaged directly sexually.

A bed maid typically doesn't directly take part in the sexual activities but will assist in entry, application of birth control and lubrication, maintaining erection, serving sexual toys etc. In some cases the sex between the couple may be entirely passive. With the maid being held responsible for the one or both of the parties reaching climax while they are coupled.

"You look amazing in this light. Call the bed maid..."

"I must have you now! Summon the bed maids."

by Privalux April 28, 2024

Bed brushing

Lazy brushing of da hair on da bed

I made a new thing, bed brushing.

by Killakatniss April 21, 2021

Uno Go to Bed

When one's parent(s) enter the room while their microphone isn't muted and shout "UNO GO TO BED!"
This means that 1 person hence uno will be forcefully put to sleep.

Nadia the COD Player:Tyla "UNO GO TO BED"
Tyla:Guys I have to get off the gam---.
Me:It looks like uno had to go to bed

by Codename_Jeff April 13, 2024

Forever bed

A different term for coffin,

Comfort for a mother who has lost a child,

Isaac is now in his forever bed, forever sleeping

by Ashaboyle September 5, 2020

japanese bed self-pleasure technique

a method of masturbation in males wherein the males make their dick erect and then lie down on bed and rub their dick against the bedsheets and bed to gain sexual stimulation, mimicking actual missionary pose but with the bed.

A: bro i wanna feel real sex
B: go the bed and use the japanese bed self-pleasure technique bro!

by holysanta July 17, 2025

Waxing the bed

The act of taking some form of tape or another sticky substance, putting it across your bed, and pulling it up to get off un-wanted hair. The hair usually belongs to a pet, and is caused by the pet shedding while they sleep/lay with you on your bed.

"Dude, my dog slept with me on my bed last night. I spent a good 30 minutes this morning waxing the bed."

or

"What are you doing?"
"I'm waxing the bed. My cat decided to lay in it when I was gone, and sheds a lot.

by zig12 August 9, 2009