Barnacle

When you take a large shit and It goes *plop plop* while you are watching G.I.L.F porn

Person 1: Damn dude that's disgusting

Person 2: I know dude I totally had a barnacle

by XXX.THOT.PATROL.XXX June 20, 2018

crisis barnacle

Someones who manufactures a crisis as an excuse to attach themselves to others.

The office crisis barnacle's parasitic grip on the boss tightened with her every phony squeal for help.

by snakeplisskent July 19, 2019

Barnacle nibbler

When a sexual partner nibbles on the other hemorrhoids

Hey man how was your date? It was great she was a barnacle nibbler.

by The Catholic May 9, 2018

Barnacle Stroking

To scrub oneself while taking a cold shower.

Guy 1 "Bro I had such a nice time barnacle Stroking it last night."
Guy 2 "I'm not a fan of the cold, but you do you bro."

by Biggus-Meatus June 10, 2025

Cum Barnacles

The result of dried cum growing up into an actual creature, but is immobile

JIMMY: Why can't you clean your screen off? It's so dirty.
SEAN: The cum barnacles bite me whenever i try to clean it. Really fucking annoying.

by Afawoopster March 5, 2019

Barnacle

A crass word used as a profanity in everyday lingo. Also Anna obscure sea creature that latches on ships and boats.

Kyle: Did you hear what Matilda said?
Luke: Yes, it was a load of barnacles

Kyle: True that

by Booty is my specialty May 23, 2016

Bowl barnacle

An unrelenting morsel of fecal matter that refuses to loosen it's death grip on the toilet bowl's porcelain surface. It laughs in the face of repetitive flushing. Attempts to cleanse it via targeted urination are futile at best. It is a testament to the resilience of a well-formed stool. It is a beacon of undigested hope in an otherwise dark cave of despair. It is clingy, yet capable. It is...the bowl barnacle.

Just when she thought that she had readied their lavish Milwaukee loft for company, she discovered that her husband, after eating a bag of cheese curds, had left a large bowl barnacle in the guest bathroom toilet.

by Kjizzy February 24, 2018