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Intelligent Retard

An otherwise smart person who acts like a complete retard for unknown reasons. The intelligent retard usually lurks in universities wasting other people's time by making stupid or irrelevant comments repeatedly in order to (a) hear the sound of their own voice, (b) sound smart, or (c) make a retarded contribution to a coversation. They also have been known to repeat other peoples concise comments in a round-about twenty minute long narrative. There is no escape from the intelligent retard once they get going. Ignoring or shunning only has moderate success. Usually, you have to let their verbal diarrhea run it's course.
Teacher: Today we will be discussing ethical standards of practice

Intelligent Retard: (interrupts) I've read that according to the CPA guidelines................... (twenty minutes later)... so that's what I feel is correct.

Random Student: What an intelligent retard!
by Ann8424 July 19, 2010
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Retard Rub

When someone is trying to say you are being stupid but politely by just rubbing your arm or shoulder or head.
" Im not being stupid, don't you Retard Rub me!!!"
by crazybirdlover September 6, 2009
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retard jones

a downright stupid and worthless being that usually wear (but are not limited to) velcro shoes and can't think for themselves and speak in a foreign tung .
hey retard jones what you lookin at i ain't got no porkchop sandwiches for you.
by kalisz June 14, 2010
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Crypto-Retard

Someone who is so retarded that they don't know they are a retard. A person whose entire family is dumb as fuck, but they all lied to this person and told him that he is smart. In truth the person is the stupidest fuck alive.
You fucking crypto-retard; you dumb cunt. Go back to the first grade you crypto-retard. Can you even read you crypto-retard?
by YouDumbMan October 24, 2017
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Turbo Retard

A Turbo Retard is someone who acts so quickly, they don't have time to think about what they're doing. This usually ends up being something so dumb, everyone in a 50m radius facepalms in disbelief, its like a train wreck you just can't look away.

Turbo retards act faster than synapse exchange, and thus cannot understand how retarded their actions are.
In their minds they are gods among men, galaxy brains surrounded by smooth brains.
Bob went Turbo Retard the other day... he just bought a whole new monitor because his display cable was broken.
Damn Frank over there is going Turbo Retard on those targets, has he even landed a shot?
Damn Billy you gotta stop going Turbo Retard or you'll never work out how to solve this one.
by Admiral Doot Doot June 15, 2021
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Retard Alert

A way of warning people that a retard is present in the vicinity. Can be either verbal or typed. Used primarily on forums when someone says something so incredibly ignorant or stupid, you simply cannot believe it.
Noob: THE GP2X IS BETTER THAN THE PANDORA
forum member: ...The Pandora isn't even out yet......
another member: Oh god, RETARD ALERT!
by DCGM June 4, 2008
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