Shit My Bed

an exclamation of surprise or dismay following the delivery of important or significant news, as one would be surprised after shitting the bed
Guy #1: "Hey dude, we're going out to the club after the game."
Guy #2: "Well, shit my bed, that's gonna be a hell of a good time."
by Go Hogs! August 30, 2010
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shit my ham

The act of being so drunk and that's the only three words you can say.
by Brad3443 September 12, 2017
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Shitting My Dick

When one pushes a shit out so hard that a male's genitals shoot up into the intestine, and come screaming out of the colon like a bat out of hell, often resulting in debris, ie. colon splashes. The sensation of "shitting of one's dick" may intoxicate the shittee into sureal hallucinations of peewee's playhouse. Shitting of Dick is a result of someone going to banana sandwich trying to forcefully discharge a fart, in rare cases producing mass amounts of chocolate rain and doo doo butter. Ancient tales tell of a superior being, Lordi, who is said to collect the remnance of a dick shit.
"Glucose, chill out with the protein shakes, or you'll end up shitting your dick like last monday!"

"Hey bro, can you give me a hand, I think I'm shitting my dick!"
by Dirty Uncle Red December 16, 2008
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shit my tits

a phrase expressing a number of emotions, depending on the tone: indifference, surprise, acceptance, and so forth.
"dude i just ran into your car"
"well shit my tits"
by mcjew November 18, 2007
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shit my wack

Omg that haunted house was so scary I totally shit my wack
by Drinkypants February 10, 2018
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Shit my heck

When you're put into a stressful situation and you can't run away or kys so you shit your heck.
Sophia: Ngh my parents are legit assholes I want to run away.

Claire: Same, I’m gonna shit my heck.
by whatthefook April 22, 2019
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shitting my stick

It is another way of saying "are you kidding"
Wife: my water broke
Husband: "are you shitting my stick"
by Lizzzssss July 20, 2017
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