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cody johnson

a santa with an even smaller pp but still shows it to people over video chat he also has a granny fettish
by Cj23453 March 7, 2019
mugGet the cody johnsonmug.

Johnsoned

When a homophobic man gets found out to be gay in a very ironic/funny fashion. Like American politician Mike Johnson, who sent a picture of his face to a man on Grindr, after referring to same-sex marriage as a, "Dark harbinger of chaos"
Guy 1: Did you hear what happened with Mike Johnson?

Guy 2: No, what happened to him?

Guy 1: He sent his face pic to a guy he was trying to hook up with on Grindr

Guy 2: That homophobic asshole got Johnsoned on Grindr? What a dork
by Minty Freshness March 26, 2025
mugGet the Johnsonedmug.

Bald Eagle Johnson

Bald Eagle Johnson is a descriptive term or pejorative of a black woman who wears a hair hat instead of her real hair.
Dr. D Fraud: Hey playa whatcha doin this weekend?

Home Boy: I am about to knock the wallz off dis here Bald Eagle Johnson while her fat ass shakes on my jimmy!
by DrDFraud April 23, 2021
mugGet the Bald Eagle Johnsonmug.

Johnson

When asked a question (any question) to which one thinks you know the answer, the verb to "Johnson" is to waffle, procrastinate and create sufficient bluster so as to fool, create absolute confusion and go off on a tangent, leaving the questioning party stunned and bemused.

To hide your absolute incompetence, or unpreparedness, or lack of understanding/comprehension by spouting totally irrelevant bullshit, including latin or greek which nobody understands, as an answer to a valid and simple question. When said with the unsolicited self-confidence of an expensive Conservative-funded public school education, the "Johnson" answer can be pulled from the bag in absolutely any circumstance.
I asked Boris what he'd like for dinner last night, and i got such a "Johnson" answer, i couldn't remember my name and i'd lost 25 minutes of my life. I felt like i'd been hit by a fucking bus. I do vaguely remember him spouting some shit about the Bermuda Triangle and what happened to Michael Jackson. I won't be doing that again.
by dying_fish September 26, 2020
mugGet the Johnsonmug.

Jaeda Johnson

The absolute most amazing girl in the world. She will do anything in the world for you and has the most amazing personality. She'll love you for all your flaws and insecurities. She has the most beautiful eyes and the sexiest body. If you treat her right she'll show you what real love feels like. Hold on to her forever.
Guy 1: Did you see Jaeda Johnson's butt today?
Guy 2: Yea that shit looks phat
by Damianloveshisgf April 1, 2022
mugGet the Jaeda Johnsonmug.

Muddy Johnson

When you get shit-dicked with pungent diarrhea. The kind that stings the nose and causes the eyes to water.
"I was on a Tinder date the other day and it went horrible. We had lunch at Taco Bell and she ended up giving me a Muddy Johnson later that night."
by Fructussy October 17, 2025
mugGet the Muddy Johnsonmug.

Bulbous Johnson

Bulbous Johnson refers to the penis being very large and bulging.

The term originated in Atlanta, USA.
Man I just used my Bulbous Johnson on that gal
by Pencil J. March 13, 2025
mugGet the Bulbous Johnsonmug.

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