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Captain

Captain

Possibly from Serbia, but now a full fledged American, the Captain is a heroin addict with the MOST experience in their circle of user-friends, affording him the biggest ship (the most drugs) to stand at the helm and steer (appear conscious while actually on the nod) everyone safely thru their high.

The Captain must always be on the lookout for smaller ships, little up and commers, that could damage his vessel. It's a big ocean out there, and it's full of dangers that could kill his vibe. The Captain knows he put in work to get where he is, and there's always going to be pirates out on the sea, looking to take it from him.

The Captain has a reputation of bitches always flocking to him, trying to get on his ship, but he prides himself (even gets off on) telling them all no. It's partly how he stays in command with that power. Besides the captain usually has a Jenny sponsoring him, so his needs are well handled, and for that captains are very loyal beings with less likelihood of scandalous tendencies.

Side effects of being the captain, he becomes accustomed to.people just hooking him up with free work, and so when he runs out, which is rare, it becomes his excuse for why he disappeared all day (looking for drugs).
Parents: where were you with our car all night??
Captain: chill, Im the captain, i had to go work for work! Plus.my ship docked and needed it's captain to come and steer it for a while..
by Jenny520 March 4, 2019
mugGet the Captainmug.

Captained

It's when someone is sitting next to something you can do the captains pose and fart next to them. Or in their face...... Even better!
There was an empty chair next to him so I captained him!
by Paulie Bhoy September 27, 2013
mugGet the Captainedmug.

captain c

Cialis, the drug that helps one maintain an erection for long periods of time
"Wow, i am so glad that i had pleny of captain c's on hand for the marathon of sex i had with mia this weekend. A true miathon needs Capt. C's!"
by mia's friend September 2, 2007
mugGet the captain cmug.

Captain Mess

A legend!

One who destroys little green soldiers!
Captain Mess, loved by all, respected by done!
by Captain Mess January 23, 2021
mugGet the Captain Messmug.

Captain Chromosome

Someone who is acting like a 2 year old on speed
by Gamingman November 1, 2021
mugGet the Captain Chromosomemug.

captain obvious

Often used to refer to someone who ruins a joke by stating the obvious
Mostly used in comment sections of social media platforms
Hey look mom, it's captain obvious!
Oh no, captain obvious on the wheel again!
mugGet the captain obviousmug.

cracker captain

Ayo did you hear Cracker Captain is finally getting kicked out of office!!?!?
by Aocstan January 18, 2021
mugGet the cracker captainmug.

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