monkey land

A special place full of monkeys and land

Woah that a cool Monkey land wonder if Jacobs there

by Melon238 January 8, 2021

door monkey

A hotel bellboy, ideally one wearing a wack uniform with a stupid-looking organ-grinder cap. No racial connotation, he (usually) can be any race.

The door monkey at the Hyatt rushed me but I blew past him cause I wanted to get straight to my room and take a dump.

by Floyd Sig September 15, 2007

Scan Monkey

Any lowly employee in a retail big box store. Commonly seen wearing colored polo shirts with name tags and khaki pants, carrying some sort of portable barcode scanning apparatus, such as a scan gun. Usual habitats include, but are not limited to: Walmart, Target, Best Buy, Old Navy, Shoe Carnival, and at one time, Blockbuster Video. The Scan Monkey is well-known for its constant screeches of sarcasm and passive-aggressive tendencies, particularly towards figures of authority and their customers.

Approach one at your own risk, preferably while baring gifts of candy... or caffeine.

Jimmy: Let's see, I'm 30 now and I've worked at Walmart, Blockbuster, Hot Topic, Krogers, Best Buy, Sears, and now I'm doing a nickel as an Assistant Guest Services Specialist over at Rent-A-Center.

Kevin: So in other words, you've been nothing but a professional Scan Monkey your whole adult life?? *snort*

Jimmy: Eat my arse, BUTT MUNCH!!

by jimmydevious January 27, 2013

quat monkey

Characterized by a white person that has a fear of black people and tries to overcome this fear by sleeping with black men.

Tristan Bentz is a quat monkey!

by tbdoesnotcumnaturally December 20, 2019

freezing the monkey

when you bang a snowman people will call it freezing the monkey

MOM leave I am freezing the monkey come back later

by MrDickleson August 11, 2019

dongle monkey

A piece of dried fecal matter that hangs off of one or many pubic hairs on the underside of a mans's testicles.

Dude, the other day I kept on feeling this dongle monkey smacking up against the side of my leg when I was going commando. Ended up having to tear my pubes out from the root, it was so dried up.

by Not my real name. What a shame August 25, 2018

monkey straps

When two black men hang their members over a girls shoulders and get jacked off

Dude that bitch is so dirty she must get monkey straps by everyone in school

by Jaime Lannisterasdasdasd April 12, 2014