The Hitchhiker

Thoughts in time and out of season

The Hitchhiker

Stood by the side of the road

And leveled his thumb

In the calm calculus of reason

Hi. how you doin'? I just got back into town L.A.

I was out on the desert for awhile

Yeah. in the middle of it

Right

Hey, listen, man, I really got a problem

When I was out on the desert, ya know

I don't know how to tell you

But, uh, I killed somebody

(No?)
It's no big deal, ya know

I don't think anybody will find out about it, but
Just, ah

This guy gave me a ride, and ah
Started giving me a lot of trouble

And I just couldn't take it, ya know

And I wasted him

Yeah

The Hitchhiker

by Death Menace May 2, 2023

Penis hitchhiker

Also know as a PH A women who goes guy after guy getting railed

Man 1: did you hear about Emily? Man 2: no what happened. Man 1: she banged the whole football team man 2: she is such a penis hitchhiker

by Gayblackmidgetfurryclownautist September 23, 2023

Texas Hitchhiker

The act of pooping in someone’s mouth and then them giving you a blowjob with the poop still in your mouth, while next using the puke from having poop in their mouth to give you a handjob.

Oh man, that girl sure looks like she would give a good Texas Hitchhiker.

by Toast9150 June 26, 2025

the hitchhiker

Similar to "the shocker", but 2 in the pink, and the THUMB in the stink instead!

"The other day, I had this girl spread out, waiting to get heavy...but I surprised her! I flipped her over on her belly and gave her the hitchhiker instead!!! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

by 0jir0 February 3, 2026

Skippin' and Hitchin'

The pre-fight gestures displayed by righteous brothers immediately preceding the opening of a can of Whoop Ass...on a boat dock...in Montgomery, Alabambambambama.

They rolled up on the USS Saltine skippin' and hitchin' after they saw that black man get jumped by a pack of white guys and then they kicked they asses.

by Tommi McLaughlin August 8, 2023

Florida handlebar hitchhike

After being anally fucked in missionary by your partner or significant other, you then get picked up and worn like a backpack. Meanwhile, your partner or significant other fucks a tiny dwarf bitch reverse cowgirl.

I just got a florida handlebar hitchhike and it was amazing

by ThatSquidy69 September 2, 2025