Read the paper

What you should do when you know regular media ( except radio and newspapers) will drive you off the rails

Don't listen to fox News or CNN, go read the paper.

by Sexydimma January 18, 2022

scooby paper

Cloth used to clean up after intercourse.

Example: thanks for the lay Marty, can you please pass me the scooby paper?

by Scooby dumb December 15, 2022

paper straw

(verb) When you suck 75% of the way and then give up.

I got paper strawed by that hookup last night. I had to finish myself off after he left.

by Duhl February 3, 2024

Paper Rape

Paper Rape is when your mom/dad signs a consent form for your field trip, educational enhancement, extracurricular participation, etc. without your actual consent

Dad: Son, I signed the consent form for the field trip
Son: Dad, I didn't want to go.
Dad: Oh no! I committed Paper Rape!

by QueerLawyer February 16, 2021

Reading the Paper

A phrase used to nonchalantly tell someone that you are smoking marijuana. The phrase brings with it a large number of puns that can be quite humerus.

Friend: (Calls you on the phone) Hey man, what are you doing?

You: I'm just sitting around 'reading the paper'!

Friend: Sweet, so I guess you got the 'news'!

You: Totally got the 'news'!

by TheGreatBigD August 26, 2014

Paper Stamp

The act of dipping ones balls in a bucket of drywall mud and then teabagging a lazy or napping member of the constitution crew. Add a peice of drywall tape to make the stamp complete. Members of the #505 local union are the G.O.A.T at the paper stamp.

Mike: "Hey Joe, do you see John's lazy ass sleeping over in the corner?"

Joe: "Yeah , fetch me my mud bucket, I'm about to paper stamp his bitch ass face".

by My name is mud. January 18, 2025

Cock, Paper, Scissors

When you play the game Rock Paper Scissors and your opponent mimics the motion of jerking off instead of forming a rock and creating a shake like motion.

I challenge you to a game of Cock, paper, scissors!

by TomWon April 29, 2022