A variation of regular flicker gooning (masturbating or "gooning" while repeatedly flicking the tip of the penis at a quick pace to achieve farther ejaculation), said to have been created by the Aztecs around 1300.
The Aztec flicker gooning technique was so effective that cumshots could reach distances of 100 to 500 meters. Some Aztecs, who specialized in this technique, could reportedly shoot as far as 1000 meters.
Not only was it capable of extreme range, but it also provided a level of pleasure unmatched by any other form of masturbation.
According to legend, Aztec warriors used this technique as a weapon, with their semen traveling at such speed and distance that it could heavily wound enemies upon impact.
Some believe that flicker gooning played a role in Aztec rituals, to summon or bring sacrifices to the gods of gooning and edging. Though there are not enough sources to confirm this for certain.
Unfortunately, after the European conquest of the Aztec Empire in 1521, all knowledge of how to perform the Aztec flicker gooning technique was lost.
The Aztec flicker gooning technique was so effective that cumshots could reach distances of 100 to 500 meters. Some Aztecs, who specialized in this technique, could reportedly shoot as far as 1000 meters.
Not only was it capable of extreme range, but it also provided a level of pleasure unmatched by any other form of masturbation.
According to legend, Aztec warriors used this technique as a weapon, with their semen traveling at such speed and distance that it could heavily wound enemies upon impact.
Some believe that flicker gooning played a role in Aztec rituals, to summon or bring sacrifices to the gods of gooning and edging. Though there are not enough sources to confirm this for certain.
Unfortunately, after the European conquest of the Aztec Empire in 1521, all knowledge of how to perform the Aztec flicker gooning technique was lost.
"We learned about the Aztec Empire in history class today. Their gooning technique was wild. I wish I could learn the Aztec flicker gooning technique and shoot my load 500 meters!"
by Sir. Glizzy III November 15, 2024
Get the Aztec flicker gooning mug.The act of gooning in various different locations around the globe.
Every location that is successfully gooned at is considered a "Goon Checkpoint"
Every location that is successfully gooned at is considered a "Goon Checkpoint"
After 35 years of competitive gooning, I have successfully reached my final goon checkpoint... Chuck e cheese
by the toucher 67 November 29, 2025
Get the Goon Checkpoint mug.by RCFMO August 29, 2024
Get the looks gooning mug.by Nelly-Hater February 16, 2024
Get the nelly-gooning mug.Just like flicker jabs, you make that swinging motion in your neutral, when its time to jab, ea: goon, you sling your hand like Ryo Mashiba in hajime ippo, this time, instead of your arms having insane reach with your jabs, its your goon blast shooting very far
Dang bro, i had a flicker goon jerkmate ranked match with a guy, he lasted 2 seconds linger than my personal record; 5 seconds!
by Johnathus Semen July 5, 2025
Get the Flicker Goon mug.A U.S. citizen who participates in military style firearms and tactical training in order to be proficient in combat. Whether to defend the U.S. mainland from foreign invasion or potential government tyranny.
by Goon1776 August 18, 2022
Get the Goon mug.The sacred art of flicking one's penis or clitoris between strokes or rubs, altering between flicks and rubs. This achieves a rhythm so divine that it promises a state of unparalleled pleasure. The term draws inspiration from the biblical promise of the land of Canaan to Abraham—a covenant of fulfillment and maximum goon pleasure and volume.
In this context, however, the "land of milk and honey" is less about geography and more about the boundless euphoria found in perfectly synchronized flicks and strokes. Legend holds that even G-d sits in the celestial cuck chair, edging while marveling at the ingenuity of its own creation's ability to out-goon the holiest of holy.
Practitioners believe this technique ensures maximum engagement with the pleasure centers, occupying the body and mind as fully as an ancient prophecy fulfilled.
Truly, it is a modern pilgrimage for the devoted in gooning.
In this context, however, the "land of milk and honey" is less about geography and more about the boundless euphoria found in perfectly synchronized flicks and strokes. Legend holds that even G-d sits in the celestial cuck chair, edging while marveling at the ingenuity of its own creation's ability to out-goon the holiest of holy.
Practitioners believe this technique ensures maximum engagement with the pleasure centers, occupying the body and mind as fully as an ancient prophecy fulfilled.
Truly, it is a modern pilgrimage for the devoted in gooning.
USAGE 1:
Brian: Yo, where’s Dave? We’re trying to run this trio in valo rn, and he’s not responding!
James: Oh, it’s Shabbat. You know how he gets. He’s probably deep into his daily Canaanite Flicker Gooning. Something about “honoring the ancestors” while also achieving “maximum occupation of pleasure.” He’ll be back after he’s, uh, spiritually fulfilled?
USAGE 2:
Sammi: Where the hell is Sarah? We’re all waiting for her to pick a movie, and she’s MIA.
Jessica: Bruh, it’s Friday night. You already know she’s deep in her Canaanite Flicker Gooning session—probably ass-naked on her bed, double-flicking like she’s summoning ancient spirits. She says it’s about “embracing divine pleasure” or some shit, but let’s call it what it is: she’s just trying to goon herself into the promised land of milk, honey, and whatever else she can squirt out.
Sammi: Honestly, fair. If I could flick my bean into a transcendent coma, y’all wouldn’t see me on movie nights either.
Brian: Yo, where’s Dave? We’re trying to run this trio in valo rn, and he’s not responding!
James: Oh, it’s Shabbat. You know how he gets. He’s probably deep into his daily Canaanite Flicker Gooning. Something about “honoring the ancestors” while also achieving “maximum occupation of pleasure.” He’ll be back after he’s, uh, spiritually fulfilled?
USAGE 2:
Sammi: Where the hell is Sarah? We’re all waiting for her to pick a movie, and she’s MIA.
Jessica: Bruh, it’s Friday night. You already know she’s deep in her Canaanite Flicker Gooning session—probably ass-naked on her bed, double-flicking like she’s summoning ancient spirits. She says it’s about “embracing divine pleasure” or some shit, but let’s call it what it is: she’s just trying to goon herself into the promised land of milk, honey, and whatever else she can squirt out.
Sammi: Honestly, fair. If I could flick my bean into a transcendent coma, y’all wouldn’t see me on movie nights either.
by 000Six_Six000 December 10, 2024
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