gourmet crumpet

A nice “bit of crumpet” who is gourmet in her sexual flexiblitly: in particular, receiving pleasure by watching and facilitating her man in to a ménage a trois. And/or is orally fixated.

.oh Mella ..shes amazing and loves watching me fuck other girls and joining in just at the right moment to get us all to cum at the same time... she really is Gourmet Crumpet.

by Oblique Geek January 12, 2018

Crumpet Baster

The performer of the art of basting crumpets such there are , were crumpet means snatch or pussy, applied by 'wisking' or gently oscillating fingeritively solids into liquids, thus creating a type of vacuum that no man can escape.

We have a cold newby in this porn scene....we will require our best crumpet baster to liquify the vaginal butter into a softy cream in the shortest amount of time....stat.

by Ball splat November 8, 2019

Crumpet sucker

A derogatory term used to describe the British, as they love their crumpets.

American: "Ah, here comes the crumpet sucker!"

by He8i3 May 4, 2022

Cock Crumpet

A very sexually desirable and attractive person.

I haven’t seen him all weekend. He’s got a new bit of Cock crumpet.

by Petunia Fortunia March 5, 2022

cooch crumpets

a genital yeast infection

the doctor diagnosed me with cooch crumpets

by hgffff March 27, 2019

Soggy Crumpet

Another male masturbating game similar to soggy biscuit, but much worse as the target is now a crumpet (a much more absorbent vessel). Participants must circle jerk onto the crumpet. Whoever comes first is deemed the winner and the loser must eat the cum-loaded crumpet.

Soggy biscuit? That's nothing, try soggy crumpet!

by yoshi12 October 10, 2014

english crumpet

The act of eating a crumpet out of a pussy

He had an English crumpet for breakfast

by Dr.seemorevaginas December 8, 2013